Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. In this 99-minute public presentation, psychologist and meditation teacher Liana Taylor explores how personality typologies can deepen self-awareness and improve working relationships. She opens with small-group exercises where participants identify colleagues they’ve worked well with and those who proved challenging, then maps those relationships against leadership qualities including self-awareness, vision, and engagement. Taylor then guides the room through an experiential sorting using the Four Temperaments—sanguine, choleric, melancholic, and phlegmatic—inviting people to physically position themselves and reflect on each type’s strengths (the sanguine’s inspiration, the choleric’s drive, the melancholic’s depth, the phlegmatic’s steadiness) and shadow sides. She illustrates these patterns with a clinical anecdote about a choleric mother misreading her phlegmatic teenager’s natural temperament as pathology. In the second half, she introduces the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) via its four polarities—introversion/extraversion, sensing/intuition, thinking/feeling, judging/perceiving—emphasizing that these are flexible tendencies, not rigid boxes, and offering frameworks for cross-type collaboration in teams. Throughout, Taylor frames typologies as conversation-starters for awareness rather than diagnostic labels, weaving in references to the Enneagram and Wealth Dynamics. Suited for working professionals and those interested in Buddhist-informed leadership and mindfulness in the workplace.
File metadata (for organising)
File: 2008 11 28 Buddha in the Boardroom 28-11-08.mp3
UUID: 8dceb646-3fed-4814-ac26-d92c3d739982
Teacher: Liana Taylor
Collection: Liana Taylor Buddha in the Boardroom (Liana Taylor)
Date: 2008-11-28
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Words: ~13,053
Welcome everyone, it’s lovely to see you all. Is anybody here new tonight that hasn’t been at one of these tours before? A few people. Okay, it’s very lovely to see you. Some people are kind of used to what goes on and for those of you who aren’t, well you can have the adventure in finding out.
What I’d like you to do, some of you who are familiar with me will know this, but I’d like you all to put up your right hand very gently. And I want you to reach out and touch someone near you. And I want you to say very lovingly to them, please turn off your mobile. The two things that matter to us most in life are love and happiness. Leadership is a part of that journey of love and happiness, and it’s a part of how we create happiness for ourselves and others, and how we share our love in the world.
World. Leadership’s about vision, insight, and relationships, both about self and about others. It’s a bit of a relief, I thought. Our guest might have been somewhere else this week, so it’s good he could make it. We can only work skillfully with that which we know, and to understand that which we know is an act of awareness.
Mindfulness and meditation is one form of awareness and some of the exercises and things we’ll be talking about tonight with personality factors and personality typologies are simply a tool to increase our awareness. So to start that exercise tonight, as soon as you’re settled, I’ll get you unsettled. In a moment, not just yet, in a moment, I’ll get you to find one other person to work with if there are odd numbers of people in the room, form one group of three, and I’ll give you about five minutes to talk with each other and what I’d like you to talk about is think about the working context you’ve worked in. Think about the working context where you’ve had working relationships with people either peers, subordinates, managers, seniors, board members, whoever in a working context. One or two examples of working relationships that have just gone really really well for you.
Yeah, so I want you to think of one or two working relationships. If you’re not used to being in a paid work environment, all of us work somewhere. So whether it’s at your kids school or at Buddha House or with the Jung Society or wherever you are, you’re all working somewhere in the world in addition to what you do in your domestic sphere. One or two people where you’ve had really good working relationships and one or two people where those working relationships have been quite challenging for you if not, downright want to kill them or run away or something like that. Has anybody ever felt like that in a working relationship?
Glad I’m not the only one. Okay. So you’ve got five minutes. Think of one or two people that you’ve really enjoyed a working one or two people that you’ve really not, that you found very challenging and perhaps not enjoyed the working relationship with, and share just briefly some of the qualities. I’d ask you to refrain from telling long stories about these journeys with these people, but share some of the qualities about the other person that were a part of you enjoying working with them and some of the qualities that made it difficult for you to work with them.
Is that clear? You’ve about five or six minutes. Off you go. And there’s someone on the floor. And there’s someone over there.
Join do join a threesome. Do join and make a threesome. So you still have a little bit of time to go, and I just want to encourage you to identify some of the qualities about those people, as well as any stories you’re telling. Them. The qualities.
And I’ll get you the one that up. Stay with the people you’re sitting with because you can keep, talking about these things in a moment. What I’d like you to do is just consider those people, those one or two people that you’ve had a really enjoyable relationship with and those one or two people that have either been very challenging or not enjoyable, not always the same thing, and just consider lightly for a moment the qualities in terms of the things that we’ve covered over the last few weeks. When we were talking about the getting of wisdom, these were some of the qualities that we talked about in terms of leadership disciplines, disciplines of leadership. You don’t need to have been here to understand that some of them are relatively self evident.
Self awareness, self development, self management, clarity of vision, clarity decisions, engaging others, cultivating wholeness. Now what we were talking about that week is that some people have a real strength in each of the in some of these areas and some of us don’t have a natural strength or tendency toward those areas. So in a moment, I’ll get you to reflect on those people that you’ve identity identified and see which would have been their areas of strengths and or weaknesses that were affecting you in that relationship, either to make it a positive relationship or to make it a challenging or difficult relationship. One of the other things we did in week two in taming self Doubt and Other Fictions of the Mind, we were looking at the way straight out of Buddha’s teachings about how we respond to situations in life. You know, we respond by having a judgment that something is likable, we like it, and having a judgment that something is not likable, we want to push it away, avoid it, be angry at it.
Or we have a situation when we’re not quite sure what’s going on and sometimes we just don’t have much awareness. Parallel with that is a condensation into three personality types coming from the Buddhist teachings, and those types tend to be towards. So something happens, good or bad, we move toward it. Something that happens, we like it or we don’t like it, we move away from it. Something happens, and we just stand still.
Yeah? So there’s those tendencies coming out of the Buddha’s teachings. And then last week, we looked at adventurers and attitude, and we talked about five of the qualities that some of the adventurers around the world have talked about as really common qualities. Not all of us have all of them. Not all of us have all of these in great measure.
All of us have some of these in some measure, probably. And these qualities, and I know that this is quite low on the board, are courage, persistence, that’s meant to say curiosity, teamwork, and endurance. And so I want you to take a moment to reflect on those couple of people that you identified where you had an easy and enjoyable relationship and the couple of people where you had a difficult or challenging relationship and just reflect on the sorts of qualities you know that they did have or that they didn’t have. When you’ve had a moment to reflect on that for yourself, then also think about the qualities that you do have and don’t have in greater or lesser measure here. All of us can we many of us have a lot of qualities and we’ve all got those.
It’s it’s the degree. So for example, I’m perfectly capable of engaging others, but it’s not really something it’s kind of what I do because I think it’s kind and it’s useful in terms of working. But left to my own devices, I spend a real lot of time on my own. I’m very clear at making decisions. I’m a very decisive person.
I’m not so good at self management. I’m lousy with a sense of timing. I don’t organize all manner of things very well, and those people that have been to my office will see my yard full of weeds. So there are some things I’m really not very skillful at, and other things I’m really quite naturally skillful at and other things I’ve cultivated. So also look to these and see where are your strengths and where are your areas of less natural tendency or inclination.
And then when you’ve got some awareness of that, share that information with the people that you were just talking to, with the person you were just talking to, about yourself and about the other people you’ve mentioned. Go. Got five or six minutes. Is there any questions? Is it clear what I want you to do?
Yeah. And notice any patterns that may be there. There may be nothing, but if there are any patterns that you notice about the qualities of the people that you have greater challenges with or the qualities of the people that you enjoy more, and whether there are patterns relate their tendencies with your own. There may or may not be, but just notice. Do you notice any patterns?
What what did you notice in I mean, it’s a big exercise. For those of you who haven’t been here, that’s kind of a lot of new information to take in. What did you notice about the tendencies, the qualities of those people that you liked or or that you found easy to get along with and those that you didn’t or that you found challenging as compared to your own qualities? I just noticed something like the person that I the person that I like and the person that I didn’t get along with had very similar qualities. Interesting.
Difference was one of them was really lacking wasn’t very aware. So she just bulldozed everyone over and She was very courageous. Yes. Yeah. And that’s why she’s she’s survived.
So a wonderful strength. Yeah. Just sufficient insufficient awareness to recognise how that’s landing in the world amongst other people. What else did you notice? Of the qualities that I liked in a couple of people that I work with, you look at those qualities and they’re either like minded or similar to your own traits that you hold important whatever you want life.
And working with someone who is similar makes it a lot easier. There’s not as much rough sailing because you’ve got that rapport because of the similarities and values. A kind of more natural rapport and possibly from that natural rapport more forgiveness and generosity around the places that things are difficult. People we love, we just forgive them all sorts of crap. And the people we don’t like, we don’t forgive them anything.
Some of us can be like that some of the time. Adrian, what do say? Yeah. Interesting. Both people have triggered off different thoughts to me.
The first one was that the person who I did have a good working relationship with and the one that I didn’t did share very similar qualities, but the intention and how they used those qualities were polar opposites. Wow. The person I assume was, you know, the negative one was very self aware, good self management, knew what she wanted, was clear on making decisions, but used her powers for evil and self-serving and manipulative and at the expense of other people. Yeah. Yeah.
She was a person I had a good relationship with, shared similar values with me, and had all the same qualities, but the values underlying was different. Was very, very different. So the outcome, of course, of their interactions was very different. Both the intention and also possibly the way that they carry those things out. And we’ll look at that a bit more tonight too.
Thanks. Other things you noticed? I think as far as the negative personality was concerned, I felt that in your first one to seven, there was absolutely none of them. And then I compared him with somebody else who worked with in the same office who had a lovely blend of all of them. None of them came out really, really strongly, but it was a salad of all of those things.
Yes. The first guy just sitting and looking at each other, think they had didn’t have any of those. Any leadership qualities at all. Well he was like a little Hitler really, he was. Yeah.
I often compare that characteristic. Yes. The one that I was thinking of in the negative vein, I reckon probably had a clarity of vision and clarity of decision making. Yes. But that was it.
Right. Yeah. Yeah. True. Yeah.
Because I thought they wouldn’t have any of those things, and I thought about it. I thought, no. They know what they want. Yes. They want me to do it but they didn’t engage me or others, they just Yeah, do this.
Do this and had a had made a decision and that made up their mind before they had any information. Yeah. I think that clarity of vision can change from day to day depending on the politics. Well I think everything can change from day to day depending on a whole lot of things. This negative stuff.
Yep. Yep. And the context context you’re in. Yep. It’s called the blaming culture.
Yeah. Is there anything else you noticed in that process about yourself or the people that you find easy or not so easy? One of the things that we talked about was engaging others, the The person who was in there that we admired was a real person and treated other people as real people as well. And maybe that’s engaging others or maybe it’s a group of all of those things as well. That’s there as well.
It’s a quality that makes people easy to get along with oftentimes, isn’t it? They’re engaging others, having that strength. I’ve realised I’ve missed out on so many challenges the last twenty five years. I’ve worked for myself, by myself. Ah, yeah.
You’ve avoided a few things. And should I look at it as an avoidance issue? You never know. It’s very interesting that thing because sometimes, you know, we were talking last week about watering the seeds. What you know, we all have seeds of all manner of things in us, and what seeds are we going to water?
And sometimes we’re just being wise by staying away from something. I prefer to stay away from people that are really abusive and yelling and conflictual, but sometimes I’m just avoiding kind of dealing with life and and allowing myself to get used to, well, this is a normal part of life too. And so how do I learn to be with it and be around not wanting to go. So it’s finding the balance, isn’t it? Is there a question of it being selfish?
I suppose that’s an interpretation you can only understand in the context of does is how we behave serving us? Is it serving the people around us? Is it serving the planet? That’s the question I ask. If it’s not serving any one of those, perhaps we might want to look at what we’re doing.
But if it’s serving us, if it’s serving the people around us and serving the planet, it’s probably not a problem. But you’ll have your own measures in terms of ethics and things like that. Any other comments? Don’t need to have. What I’d like you to do next is get up and move, and you’ll be moving your gear.
So if it’s possible for in a moment, not just yet. In a moment, I’ll get you to take your gear to the sides of the rooms, perhaps put them on the benches so that’s out of the way. Then I’ll get the people at the back to take the back chairs back a little bit, the people at the front to move the front chairs forward a little bit, and the other people to take the middle chairs to the sides a little bit so that we’ve got chairs at the back, chairs at the front, chairs at the side, all facing inward. Okay? Off you go.
Now definitely want them in four discrete sets. So the sides are the sides, and the back is the back, and the front is the front. So, you know, we can bunch the front ones up together. Sorry. You’re sitting close.
Okay. So what we’re going to be doing tonight, part of part of what we’re looking at tonight is obviously awareness and ways ways in which we can see aspects of ourself and see aspects of other people in order to assist our awareness in order that we make wise decisions about how to live and breathe and act with other people. So what I’m going to do is look at a couple of different personality typologies as a part of this process. When we’re doing that, I’ll explain more about them later and how they fit together, but when we’re doing that, when we’re looking at personality typologies, invariably, if someone says to you, are you extrovert or introvert? Well, if it’s me, that conversation well, this behavior is extrovert, and this is introvert, and this is introvert, and this behavior is introvert.
So some of the things that I’ll ask you, and I’ll ask you to be making a choice on one side or the other, you’re going to have bits of both. Most of us have a measure of a lot of these things for the purpose of fun and enjoyment and exploration. And even if you want to lie about it or just tell a different story about yourself tonight, feel free to do that too. When I offer you a polarity, are you this or are you more that? I just want you to ponder that for a moment and not too long and just make a decision that, oh, well, tonight, I’m going to identify with this aspect of myself.
So I would prefer you to identify with the aspects that are more strong than you. And if there’s a question, just make a choice. Okay? So the first thing I want you to do, all of those people and you be moving around. You’ll sit somewhere, and then you’ll decide that somewhere else fits better.
So that’s completely fine. That’s gonna be a part of the process. All of you who would think of yourself as relatively serious, abstract in your thinking, analytical, nonpractical, perhaps sensitive, perhaps pessimistic, I want you to go and sit on those chairs down there. And those of you who are down there, if that doesn’t fit for you, move away. We haven’t got the other side it yet.
No. You haven’t got the other side of it yet. We’re gonna be watching everybody move all the time. That’s why. I’ll just write this down.
So it’s sensitive and a little bit pessimistic. Remembering, you know, I’m a psychologist, so of course there’s psychobabble, that there’s a real difference between personality and pathology, except that sometimes if we’ve been living with our pathology for long enough, it’s who we perceive ourselves to be. And so, you know, if you’re really miserable and depressive and unmotivated and unhappy all the time, and you’ve kind of been like that since you were one, that’s probably, you know, personality quality. If you only got like that after your last divorce, you know, twelve years ago and you just haven’t changed since, that’s probably pathology in terms of, you know, a little bit of grief or depression or something like that. So what we’re looking at here is personality, and often these qualities we noticed when we were younger or that we come back to in a resting time when things are going easily.
Okay. At this end, in these tiers, I want you to come up here if you would think of yourself as playful, enthusiastic, enthusiastic, present oriented, tactical, emotional, like emotionally expressive, and optimistic. So you guys guys are staying, and some more people are coming. Okay. Playful, enthusiastic.
You can keep changing and moving. Enthusiastic. Tactical. That’s probably better. It’s tactile.
Emotional. Tactile. Not touching. I’ll put tactile. I had tactile.
That’s right. Touchy feeling. Tactile. Tactile. Tactile.
Tactile. I did say tactical, but that’s because I’ve written it badly. Optimistic. Now just remember, we can keep moving and changing, and you may well want to sit on the edges of one side next to the next in the moment. Okay.
The next one. So that’s that one. This one. The next one on this side over here are the people that are fearless, assertive, focused, intense, sharp, goal oriented. Over that side.
And if you’re noticing yourself in between and that one or that one and that one then just sit you know sit around the corners there yeah assertive focused Sharp. Fearless. Okay. And over this side, over here, I’ll just do these little circles. This side over here, you’re the people that are kind of self sufficient, observant, tend to be slow, do things in a slow and steady way, consistent, reserved, and possibly conservative on this side of the room.
I’ll write those down. So this is the front, and this is the back. Slow, consistent, reserved, conservative often and observant. Now as things go one we change, two we have pathology, three we don’t we’re not very aware of ourselves sometimes even when we think we are, four we’re often deluded we prefer to think something about ourselves that in fact is not the So there are all these possibilities for how, you know, actually, we could rearrange all of you, you know, if we but this is where we are at the moment. Okay.
So these are basically how are you guys going standing up? Are you in that corner there? Uh-huh. Between Just so I need to move down this one. Between this one and this one?
Yeah. I’m gonna hover as well. You’re gonna hover a bit. Yeah. Could you hover closer?
Yes. No. I can’t. So this one up here is the front of the room, which is this. So this corner has to do this and that.
Yes. That corner there is between that and that. Yep. Yep. So you’re there in the corner?
Mhmm. Wow. What an interesting mix. Okay. Adriana, you kind of place a little bit over there, but don’t wanna identify too strongly.
I’ve got some I’ve got self sufficiency from over that corner. I’ve got a lot more from playful, enthusiastic, tactile, emotional Yeah. Some goal orientation, assertion, and some other things. Yeah. And sensitive and a little bit non practical.
So on balance So what I want to know is anybody else in the room got a whole range of a a bunch of these things? Yeah? Okay. So just tonight, if you were to identify yourself, it would either be here or here or partway between one of them, just for where you are right now, just to play with this as an idea for now. So you want us to choose?
I do. Thank you. I’ll be playful. You’ll be playful. Okay.
Save. Okay. So this is from a typology called the Four Temperaments. Who in here is familiar with the Four Temperaments? Are they noble Four Temperaments?
Not that I know about. They’re not from Buddhism. Not noble. Okay, so Barbara definitely is. Barbara teaches this stuff, so she’s a lot more familiar with it than I am, in fact, this particular typology.
Who else in here, Rod, you were saying you’re familiar with the four temperaments? Various things. At work. Other people? Oh, yeah.
Yep. A few nods. What’s it called again? The four temperaments from originally from Hippocrates. Oh.
Like, way back then. And it’s been developed and changed a little bit over time and started. Do you remember the Barbara, do you remember the beginnings in terms of the bile and the blood and all that kind of Yes. The humors and things like that. So that’s where it kind of started many years ago.
And it’s been adapted and used in different contexts over the years, including in the last century by a lot of anthropologists use this information and work with the people in these ways. So these are called, and you might be familiar with these names, sanguine, phlegmatic, melancholic, and choleric. Now you don’t have to wear these forever. If you really don’t like it, you can change where you’re sitting, or you can just listen to it and toss it out later. Okay?
So what I’m really interested in is hearing about people. So you three down there, you’re would you say kind of melancholic bordering on phlegmatic? No. Yep. Yep.
And Jampa’s not committing. I’m just comfortable. Okay. Okay. That’s fabulous.
And we have nobody actually in the full phlegmatic side of the room. Well, I’m divided because I sit equally Across those? Yep. Yep. So I’m quite happy with being pragmatic, and I’m quite happy.
Phlegmatic? Yeah. Yep. Yep. Okay.
So that’s an unusual in the middle of the room? Oh. Tough one. Tough one. Adrian got kicked off.
He did. There because that have Have we got also equally between these notes? No. Not necessarily. And Not at all.
Not at all. Everything here fits you. How interesting. At the moment, I’m more this side, but I can be more more that side. Yes.
It is. Which week it is. And do you use either of the wings, either of the phlegmatic or the choleric as much? Okay. So what I’d like is for each group to share a little bit about what it’s like being in this personality.
So for those of you who are sitting up here in the kind of sanguine area, what’s it like with your personality, especially around these other personalities? What do you like about these qualities? Share it with the whole group. With the whole group. With the whole group.
Well, I I had an immediate reaction to that. Yeah? In that I’d much rather be sanguine than caleric. In the sense that that’s the things that I think where the lightness in my life is. And these other bits are where after week we go.
Yes. So you’re preferring these, the lightness. Yep. Anything else that people enjoy about being in here? What are the other qualities apart from what’s here that go with this?
Adaptability, lightness can be the light for other people around, can be inspiring because of all of this. When you don’t kind of get caught up in all the negativity often at work when other people are carrying on about this or that process, and that’s not right. And I just look Oh well, who cares? Yeah, yeah. I’m so far into it the same way.
Not necessarily overconcerned with detail, interested in ideas or creativity around ideas and and let the phlegmatics work out sorry, phlegmatic people work out This is exactly why we do personality Let you others Yeah. Who are different and different skills Yeah. And somehow We have those details. Yep. Yep.
Absolutely. Okay. And are there any problems with being up here? Yeah. You don’t see the details.
You don’t see the details. Yep. Anything else? Yourself out a bit, flying from one thing to the other and every new different wonderful experience and person and activity. Yep.
Perceived as unserious. Yes. Perceived as unserious and and sometimes unintelligent, unskillful. Yeah. Anything else?
Can be flighty, can be superficial at worst. A bit unfocused on occasion. Can be a bit unfocused. Yep. So at best, it’s kind of like they carry the light and the inspiration for everybody and hold a big picture and bring the energy into things.
And at worst, they wear themselves out. They’re unfocused. They can be a little bit superficial, not taken seriously, and not able to follow-up with detail. That’d be about right. Now all of you other people that aren’t really close-up to here, what is it that really annoys you about the sanguines?
Come on. Give it to me. Unrealistic sometimes. Say what? Unrealistic.
Unrealistic. Yep. Absolutely. High expectation. Yeah.
Grab a chair, guys, if you want one. What was the last bit? Too much expectation. Too much expectation. Yep.
Of you and of other things. Yeah. Don’t want to be exhausting when you don’t want to be exhausted. Yes. Yes.
That little puppy dogs running around, isn’t it? Yes, little butterflies flying. Come along, fly with me. What is wrong with you? Yep.
What else do you notice? What else do you find difficult about the sanguine type? I think the emotional stuff at work. Mean, I was like, oh, look. Just can we just get the job done?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Not quite task oriented enough. Just get on there.
Yeah. Yeah. A little bit too. One of the things they talk about with sanguine, sanguines are emotionally expressive and very aware of emotions. Not always as this you know, it doesn’t matter who we are.
We can be really undeveloped human beings or really developed human beings. So it doesn’t matter where you fit in all of this. All of those levels exist. However, one of the things a sanguine can do because they’re so emotional and they can they’re very adaptable is they can be very aware of other people’s emotions. So they can often know exactly what to say because they know exactly what is going on for the other person at that time.
So that’s one of the positive aspects there, and it’s also one of the negative aspects that they want to deal with it sometimes, rather than getting on with the task, getting stuff done, or rather than thinking a bit more clearly about it, slowing down, and being a bit more reflective. Yeah? Anything else that is a challenge for you guys with the sanguines? No? What do you like about the sanguines?
Are there people in your life that are sanguines that you actually enjoy? Absolutely. Inspiration. Yeah. Inspirational.
The energy to a group and can keep everyone motivated and working and uplifted. Yep. Yep. Absolutely. The kind of lightness that carries.
Anything else you notice? Anything else you notice about the sanguines? They tend to wear colour, yes. Even Adrian’s got a sort of version of red on. Yeah, so there’s that sort of colourness.
There’s someone I know, Peter Allen, who wrote a book about comparing comparing a whole range of typologies, and he says about sanguines. You know, you’ve only got to ask them what’s in their wardrobe. And they may not necessarily wear one solid color, but they’ll have a range of colors because when they’ve got when they get up in the day, they need to decide which color they need to be that day. So there’s often a range of scarves or a range of jewelry or a range of jackets because they need to kind of live into the world that day in terms of their personality. See, a few nodding heads here and this may not fit for everybody but it’s a bit of familiarity here.
Okay. Over on the caloric side. So those people who some of you are boarding around caloric, and you’re really familiar with that. What are the good things about the caloric qualities? What do you enjoy about the caloric qualities?
Intense. Intense energy. Yep. What else? And those are to achieve what you want to achieve.
Can achieve things? Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Absolutely.
Achievers. They are definitely the achievers. They make it happen. It was good to balance it out with enthusiasm and playfulness. It’s quite a nice balance.
Yeah. Stops that side driving you crazy. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. What else do the people over here enjoy about the caloric aspects of their nature?
The the perspicacity, like, that comes with it. And my English isn’t quite as sharp as yours. Would you explain that word? It’s the sharpness. Ah, okay.
The the ability to perceive things and to understand what the core issues are. Right. Yep. To really see into that and be be sharp. Which, yeah, ties in a little bit with goal focus, I think.
Because then once you’ve got a clarity of what the what the key issues are, then you can more clearly Yeah. Sort of make decisions around that. That might also be a bit of a melancholic quality as well, that sort of clarity. Analytical. Analytical sort of clarity.
But yep. The clarity. So probably more than here. Yes. Because this would big Yes.
Mindfulness. Yeah. Mindful awareness. Absolutely. And interestingly, all of the qualities can be an expression of our mindfulness, but at different aspects of the way we express ourselves because all of these qualities are really useful, including that clarity of mind.
Any of you down there that have because you’ve got caleric qualities in you. What are the qualities caleric qualities that you really enjoy? I’m sort of sitting there really. Oh, you’re a melancholic. Okay.
You just wanna sit on your own. And you are the two? I think it’s similar for me to what other people said is that you I mean, people that are like that Get stuff done. Not be like that. Get things done.
Yep. And you yeah. And you and you do it quickly. Yes. And, yeah, you achieve and all that sort of stuff.
Yep. Yep. Great. And what are the not so useful qualities about being choleric for those of you who have choleric qualities? Oh, there’s always another goal.
Oh, yeah. Okay. So there’s no sitting back and enjoying. It’s just, okay. Get on to the next one.
Yep. What else? Definitely. Yep. Overbearing.
Say what? It can be overbearing if they want to be compassionate about other people. Yep. Too busy getting the task done. Task oriented, not people oriented.
Overbearing. Yep. Demanding. So focused that they don’t necessarily notice other other details. Yep.
That can happen too. Absolutely. Obsessive. Yep. We’re gonna add something over there, you guys?
No. She said it. Bossiness. Bossiness? Yeah.
Yep. And also a sense sometimes with the calerics that they expect everybody else to be as on the ball and sharp and driven as they are and where are you? Why aren’t you doing You’re being perfections. Oh well anybody can be a perfections I think but probably choleric, busy getting it done perhaps. Melancholic probably a bit more of a perfections.
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So for the rest of you looking over at the calerics who don’t have those at the moment as their qualities, what do you enjoy about the calerics and what is difficult? You guys in the corner, what would you say?
Anything else that you have to add? Do you know in your life? Yeah. I think you’ve covered them, haven’t you? Sort of Just checking if there’s anything else.
Yeah. That’s right. Yeah. Okay. What about the melancholics?
The people down on the bottom end, you’ve got some melancholia. You’re sitting in the melancholic. What do you like about being melancholic? Great sensitivity. Yep.
Great insight into situations and things like that. Yes. Analytically, which comes with that reflective kind of nature, so we really kind of ponder over things, take things seriously and put a lot of effort into things that we do. Yep. Yep.
And what’s not so good about being melancholic? Definitely perfectionistic, can get a bit obsessive over small details. Yep. Can take a while to feel comfortable doing things, maybe that sensitivity. Yep.
Yep. So that kind of cautiousness and Cautiousness. Yeah. Yep. Can feel like anxiety as well.
Yeah. Are there any other qualities that you guys notice as part of your melancholia? It can be quite balanced or sort peaceful as well. Yep. Yep.
Absolutely. I guess that comes from the introspective side of it. Yeah. And analytic as well. Yes.
But then also procrastination is another Problem. Problem, you know, sort of on the pessimistic side. If you haven’t got it right and you don’t know what if this and what if that and how about this and what if that and how will that happen there and how will I know if that will happen there, so what would I do first? Some of us know me melancholics well. Okay.
What about these these guys here? You’re a kind of mix between here and here. Else do you notice about the phlegmatic qualities? And if you would go. Thank you so much.
Our token phlegmatic. Flipped. It’s good that we can be adaptable sometimes, even though I wouldn’t let Adrian do it. What are the other qualities about phlegmatic? What are the things you enjoy about the phlegmatic aspects of your personality?
Self sufficient. The self sufficient. Yep. Very soft. The consistency.
Yes. The consistency. What’s the last one? Conservative? Conservative and observant.
Very observant. Very observant. Yes, often observant of other people. Conservative? Sometimes.
Depends if it suits me or not. I can be very burn sided. And then on the other hand, I can be up to Mount Barker. Yes. Yep.
Absolutely. So one of the things we recognise about all the I mean, it’s a typology. It’s, you know, it’s a pencil and paper thing. None of us fit perfectly. We’re not born into a little box.
And so they’re just opportunity say, what? We just go out in one. Yeah. That’s absolutely true. I’m sure someone could make a song out of that.
I would I would make a comedy room routine out of that. That sounds like ripe for a comedy routine. This when my creative side wants to get a pen and paper and start writing about that. But, anyway, I’ll stop because I’m doing something else right now. So when we look at these, when we’re trying to identify, the value of identifying is being able to really recognize those places where our strengths are and where we rest naturally.
I’ll come back to you in just a sec. And so we can really sit into them really comfortably and also to look at the struggles that we might have there, also to see the things that we enjoy in other people and that we think, you’re like that. You know? Often they’re the places that we have struggles with other people too, but in fact can benefit with the use of other people. Also, in any of these areas, we may only fit about eighty percent.
You would expect about eighty percent. You don’t expect to fit fully into one area. What were you going to say? There are lots of people who have overlaid these and onto several other typologies as well. A very clever humour.
So there has been a lot of studies, no? I don’t know if there’s been research made, but there are certainly books and articles written about that all over the place. So with all these typologies, they’re crossing over. Barbara, do you want to share it? Sorry.
That’s alright. I was actually thinking the flip side of the melancholic is often this amazing ability to humour. Yes, well which is Yes, that’s a melancholic quality. Yeah. And of all of these, are real strengths and there’s a real follow-up the details here not get caught up there are real strengths in all these qualities and we’ll notice for ourselves the times when, you know, when we step in to the qualities of our personality type that are not helpful to us.
The sanguine, getting exhausted, running around all the time, too much energy outward, not finishing things, not getting stuff done, that can be a problem. But the joy of the light and the inspiration and the energy and the emotional understanding of others is wonderful. And the caleric. Now if I got lost in a shipwreck or anything bad like that happened, I’d sure as hell want a really smart caleric on my team. And as much as I might get upset when they’re telling me what to do, bossing me around, and getting annoyed with me for not getting it done as well as I should and as fast as I should, in fact, before they thought they’d tell me, actually, I know that they would save my life and everybody else’s too.
They would make it happen. Yeah. I might have to get over my upset at being bossed around, especially, you know, on my personality, but they they would save us. They would make things happen. We really count on them for that.
And on the other side, if you’ve got a choleric parent with a kind of phlegmatic or melancholic child, that can be somewhat overbearing on that kid, and they can feel a bit unloved and pushed about, which is not about being unloved and pushed about. It’s simply having a different personality, different temperament. Over here with the phlegmatics, you know, I have a friend who’s a phlegmatic and she is the person who holds yes, and we have phlegmatics here. And holds the cord, you know, they they hold the glue together, the love and the families. They’re steady.
They’re even they hold the home fires burning. They’re the people that you kinda want to keep your communities together because they just stay there sitting back, observing everybody. They know what’s going on. They don’t need to run-in. They don’t need to run away.
Don’t need to analyze. They don’t need to dramatize. They just sit steadily with all of that. At best, they just keep the home fires burning, keep everything going. At worst, they can be a tad unmotivated, a tad slack, and a tad disinterested in anything, really.
Yeah? So they just as soon roll over in bed in the morning and think, I think I’ll go back to sleep because they’re not jumping out of bed. Melancholic, of course. You know, we see some incredibly beautiful poetry, literature, songs, music, all sorts of pieces of philosophy and writing written by melancholics because they do have that deep insight into existence other things. They’re steady, they’re analytical, they’re clear, they can be really sensitive and they can see the concerns that people have so they pay attention to those and not get carried away with outrageous optimism.
Of course worst, can be pretty unhappy, pretty tiresome tiring in themselves to be around the pessimism and the negativity, and that can feel a bit flattening at times. And they’re not usually very practical. Some of them are, but often not. I think what did I Did I swap phlegmatic and choleric? Yeah.
I saw you pointing. I couldn’t figure out what it was. Sorry. I did that. I just talked about the cholerics over here as if they were phlegmatic and the phlegmatics.
It’s phlegmatics. But I think I’ve covered it all. Have I? Yes. Okay.
You haven’t asked us what we don’t like about the melancholics and the phlegmatics. Okay. I was cautious about that because there are so many of you. Unless you thought they were too sensitive about it here. Do I notice a tone in there?
Let’s be mindful a moment. Bone full of feelings, mindful of subtle tones. So just one or two words. What do the sanguines find difficult about certainly the melancholics and the phlegmatics? Self absorption.
Self absorption, yeah. Especially melancholics. Anything else you find? Adrian, what’s your greatest challenge with the melancholics? I’m trying to think of who I know that that would be melancholic.
What do you think you’d fit, Leanna? Didn’t mean to connect those two together. That’s okay. Where would you think I fit? Definite elements of melancholia.
Yeah? Yeah. With some, like, maybe also some sanguine. Yeah. Yeah.
And I noticed the absence of caleric here. Well, sharp. Yeah. Some focus. No.
No. No. This is absolutely not my greatest strength yet. And I think it’s personality. This thing changes too.
I know when in my heyday, when I was young and beautiful, I’m more on the choleric in the same way. And there are different theories about that and certainly there are life stages that you go through when you start with children are more sanguine and then we go into more choleric in our young adult lives as we’re kind of getting things done and then we go to phlegmatic and melancholic? Well there are two ways, I mean you know you go into melancholia after you grow up and actually see how difficult the world is to live in. There’s confrontation. From one extreme to the other.
And then your heyday is really when you’re in the caleric Yeah, really getting things done. Material world and this is the spiritual world. And then you come back into a more reflective, phlegmatic, easygoing, mellowing into older years. So we’re all of us going through these cycles anyway, like as a natural aging process. And in addition to that, are particular things, maybe not all of us, many of us.
Yeah? And there are particular things that we we hook into. So for example, I had a woman bring a young fifteen year old to me and she was really concerned. The mother was a choleric. She was very, very concerned about this really depressive child and I was asking her what was going on with the child.
Fifteen year old girl, you know, hormonal, love years, you know, body image stuff, and it’s right up there. I say, well, what’s happening with the girl? Well, she wakes up in the morning. She doesn’t wanna get out of bed. And I’m thinking, half the population don’t wanna get out of bed in the morning.
That’s not actually pathological. You know? A caleric would get out anyway if they were in fine form. Yeah? If they weren’t unhealthy.
Anyway, so I continued to ask questions. Well, she doesn’t have a real lot of friends. Well, did she have any friends? Yes. How many friends?
Oh, two or three. What are the friendships like? Well, it’s sort of close and quiet. And does she see much of them? She speaks to them and sees them often.
Okay. So I’m getting a picture that she’s probably more phlegmatic or melancholic. Yeah? So but the mother’s choleric and very busy, has a lot of friends, a lot of social context. She thinks there’s something wrong with the child, you know?
And so then I asked all these other questions about the daughter and well, she doesn’t get all of her study done on time and why doesn’t she get a study done on time? She can’t see the importance of it. Yeah, well, she’s kind of a bit reflective and, you know, well, other people don’t get study done for other reasons either but so she just kept talking about this child in the end I just conveyed to the mother actually got out a textbook just so the mother would believe me and a textbook on the four temperaments and I showed her her temperament the caloric temperament I showed her her child’s temperament, which is predominantly phlegmatic with a little bit of melancholia. And she wrote poetry which is a bit dark. Now at fifteen, that’s about as normal as you get, you know?
Romeo and Juliet, but the mother’s freaking out, you know? Thinks wants to put the kid on antidepressants. You know? My goodness me. What a terrible thing at that time with that child.
Yeah? Not notwithstanding, sometimes, are useful, but not for this child. So, you know, the kid’s actually just living quite fully into her personality and when the mother started to come to understand that then she can support that personality, support that child in those temperaments and start to see how she works with that. And we do the same in the workplace. We start to see where people’s natural temperament is and how we support them in their temperament.
We notice what we’re reacting to in other people, what we don’t like, the people that we find difficult, the people we find challenging. And oftentimes, we find some of those answers in temperamental issues, in these temperament issues, qualities of them that we really don’t like. So what I’d like you to do now is just turn to one of the people next to you and and talk to them about what it it feels like. What are the aspects of this that you really identify with? What are the aspects that you struggle with?
What are the aspects that are really useful that you might want to live more into in your life right now? Okay. You’ve got about five minutes. Pairs in a group of three. And so I’m going to interrupt you for a moment.
What we recognize So before we go out to break, because when you can go out to break, you can continue this conversation. One of the things that we notice is that these two tend to be more extrovert and these two tend to be more introvert. Extrovert and introvert have different meanings depending on which typology and philosophy you look through. And so I don’t wanna get too finicky about all the details here because they actually mean different things in different typologies. But in this typology, these are more extrovert.
These are more introvert. Now some people would say, different theorists, different people who work with these typologies would say that you need to have friends of a very similar temperament so you can go and play together in the way that you play. So if you’re analytical and abstract, you can have abstract analytical conversations together. And that’s a kind of real meeting of each other and feeling really comfortable, and you feel really at home, and you feel met and understood. Same.
If you’re saying when you want people to go play with out in the world, do new exciting different things, go off and do spontaneous things, be optimistic and cheery together. If you’re a caleric, you want to do get stuff done together. I quite like hiking with caleric people so long as they’ve got a bit of self awareness, they don’t boss me around too much. Because they actually make everybody else get ready on time. And me for that matter too, but, you know, they make it all happen.
So so we often tend to move toward the people of a similar temperament where we feel really comfortable and really safe and often those people we just have an instant kind of sense of safety with. Some people would say we look to the people opposite. Now again, of course, we all have a smattering of all that changes over time. Life influences, and so we focus in some areas more than others. So, you know, all of those things being true.
Some theorists would say that when we’re looking for a romantic partner, we actually look to knee we need to look opposite us. Yeah? And so a sanguine, you know, out there and all fluffy and enjoying the world and inspiring and optimistic needs a melancholic as a partner. The melancholic brings the depth, which the sanguine can certainly step into and appreciate. And the sanguine brings the joy, the lightness, the optimans, which the melancholic can really appreciate, and a whole whole lot of other qualities.
So that creates both the tension that one needs in a romantic relationship and also the complementary aspects that one needs in a relationship. Opportunity for growth. A phenomenal opportunity for growth. I can’t begin to tell you how often I dance this out to clients who come to see me when they’re about to get divorced. When they actually start to see the other person’s actually not wrong for being who they are, they’re just a different species of animal.
And even there’s the gender aspects, but there’s the personality aspects that they start to understand each other and work with those, that you go to look for your friends if you want somebody of the same temperament. Same with the choleric and the phlegmatic. And this is not always commonly, we sit more strongly in one area than another. And commonly, we’ll have one of the ones either side as our kind of secondary temperament. That’s commonly, not always.
Certainly, you other people who have a kind of strength going across the board. Okay? So when you’re taking that into a workplace and you start to see other personalities, you start to see the people who you’re gonna really naturally fit with and the people you’re really not going to naturally fit with. This is another one of those aspects, along with these kinds of things, that helps us understand and have awareness in the workplace and really start to have some awareness in ourselves about what does it bring up in us when they’re doing the opposite that we think that they shouldn’t be doing. And how might we come to kind of sit with that more steadily within ourselves and within them and appreciate those differences?
This is also the element of what make what would make a most efficient functional team. Yep. If that’s your role as well. Yep. And in what sort of context you’re in.
Do you know? Absolutely. And what the team what the team should be achieving? Yeah. Yep.
If you’ve a whole bunch of people building bridges and doing engineering engineering work, you need some people who are kind of playful to kind of keep the lightness going, but you probably need a lot of people with some really good analytical skills to make it happen. You need some people who are gonna be a bit nice to the team and think about team dynamics, and you need some people who are gonna make sure everybody else makes it happen. They’re the project manager. Yep. They’re not always so good as a project manager, but they’re just bossy.
Well, the thing is that Phlegmatics make better project managers because they take care of the team. And they tell the caleric how to make things happen. The caleric makes things happen. But phlegmatic actually be a bit better taking care of the emotions of the team. Yeah?
And then delegating aspects to the caleric to get particular things done. Yeah. Very common. Very Very common. What’s needed, but you don’t get it.
Get a flagrant. Yeah. Caleric ones is in the middle of the top of the ladder. Yeah. And it’s everybody else’s And it’s really unfortunate because people get really upset with the calerics because because they can be somewhat demanding, and they get really upset with everybody else that they’re not keeping up and getting on with it and feel you know, the calyrics feel really let down by everybody else who’s not, you know, getting on with the task.
But everybody else just feels steamrolled by them. And so it’s really useful to have somebody else managing the team and then tasking particular things to the caleric and really valuing what the caleric’s got to bring and making them feel valued as long as everyone else. Would be ideal. That’s what we do. We’re doing team management stuff.
Let’s take a break for about ten minutes. There’s apricots, really nice apricots, organic. Apricots, they’re are biscuits, tea and coffee. There are also brochures out there for Buddha House. So those of you who aren’t familiar with Buddha House, if if what you’re wanting to do is learn some meditation in order to be able to be with some of the emotions that these other people bring up in you and the kind of thought process and behavior, you may want to do some meditating to assist you to do that.
So there are brochures out there for that, and there are brochures, I’ll put these out on the table, for the mindfulness center, the the courses that I do there. So if you want any of those, you can have those too. Let’s have a a bow. Let’s be back in here at ten past nine. Different happens.
So welcome back. Tonight is just one of those nights where we’re just having a really quite light look at some of these things. All the information written on the other side about temperaments will be on the website. Those of you here in the weeks before, I did talk to my PA. She sent me a text on the way over here to say she’s changed.
So all the website passwords are now Acrobat. Acrobat. Is that on the thing? Thank you. It’s on the flyer outside.
So the password for tonight will be is Acrobat, all the ones before are acrobat, you should be able to access all of the notes from all of the past weeks. There are several typologies I use in my work, and again, I come from a particular philosophy that I use the typologies more than anything as a talking point. Just an opportunity to open a conversation, to look at what might be going on, give people ways of looking at things that aren’t about this is right, this is wrong, but wow, I wonder if some of this is going on here. For some people that can be incredibly confronting because they don’t want to see some things about themselves, and for some people they really want to hold on to other people are wrong. So that’s just what some personalities are like.
The personality typologies I most use are the four temperaments, the one we just did, Hippocrates four temperaments, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, which is based on Jung’s loosely. For any of you who’ve actually how many of you are familiar with MBTI? Half the room. For any of you who’ve done any real research in the area, I mean, I’ve read Jung’s original works. So, you know, judging, sensing, thinking, perceiving, I wrote that wrong, wasn’t actually there.
And so this is kind of loosely, well, judged based on Jung’s work, and we’ll have a look at that in a moment. This is one that’s very commonly used in the workplace, but in terms of research, it’s not well, despite the fact that people who use it and learn it talk about it having good research validity. In the psychology world, it’s not considered to have sufficient validity as compared to other personality typologies. So again, I use it as a talking point, not as a place to kinda fix people in. I use the Enneagram, which is kind of, how many people here are familiar with the Enneagram?
Just a few people. I use the Enneagram quite a lot when I’m working with people for whom I think that that’s gonna be really relevant. It’s quite a rich and deep textured typology and starts with the perspective that we all come born on earth with a with a perspective of I’m burping after the apricots. You might be burping too, but you’re not under a microphone, hey? And not everybody.
And you’re not telling everybody either. Someone said that to me recently, you don’t have to own up to everything you do. It’s my coping mechanism. We all have them. The Enneagram is a typology that talks about that we come into the world and we’re all born with certain strengths.
So we come into the world with a different aspect of the picture aspects of the one and they’re about love and clarity and enthusiasm and reflectiveness. All these different aspects, there are nine dominant aspects. And so in that typology the view is that we’re all born into this earth with one of those aspects really strong as our strength. Fairly quickly as we’re born into the earth, we lose sight of that strength. And then we get really unbalanced.
And so we’re always searching to find it. And so we develop key pathologies and key goals all based on losing this and trying to find it again. So that’s a very rich typology, a very very rich typology for those who are interested and there are kind of levels of development so for people who like that kind of complex understanding, it can be really useful. And sometimes when I see someone in front of me who might be, an achiever, which is number three on the Enneagram topology and very goal driven and very what they look like driven. You know, they’re very conscious of what they look like to other people and, it’s one of the qualities.
I have very few of those in my own personality style. So when I see them, it kinda hits up against me a little bit and they don’t naturally come to therapy and certainly not with me in my house that is not very well taken care of, you know. And myself, you know I’m not that into just looking perfect all the time whereas number three kind of really needs to do that and that is absolutely their strength. So that’s just a good example of how we look at those different typologies and when I see that quality in someone or some of the other qualities of the Enneagram and I see that in someone if that’s something that they’re struggling with then I pull out that and get them to have a look at it. The other one that I use recently which only came to know this year is the Wealth Dynamics typology used by Roger James Hamilton, an entrepreneur who believes in entrepreneurship in order to raise money to save the world.
And he has developed a typology which is a mapping of the MBTI which we’ll look at a bit more in a moment over the five Chinese elements, also with a kind of three-dimensional spiritual view. And so that’s another typology I look, especially in terms of people in their workplace and where we’re putting our energy into our workplace and what sort of working lives that we’ve got that really have us in flow and sort of what sort of working lives do we have that are sucking the life out of us. Yeah. So it’s very specific about working and entrepreneurship, and it’s really useful for that. Roger Hamilton.
And for some reason, I bought a few texts with me, and I didn’t bring that one. He wrote a book called Your Life, Your Legacy. And also it’s a one word. What’s the other one wink yes if you want to do that typology let me know because I can organize that for you it’s a it’s a online thing, but if you want the book, can check look it up on the web on the Google, and you’ll find it. So I just very briefly want you to come back to after that whole look at the four temperaments just so that we shift out of one gear and into another gear so you’ve just got one other small perspective to have on yourself before you go home tonight so that we’re really aware that these different typologies look through different lenses and allow us to look at different aspects of ourselves through philosophical lenses.
This is the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. They have four polarities. Your resting temperament is either introvert or extrovert. Now either introvert or extrovert, it doesn’t mean that you’re a raging extrovert or a reclusive introvert. It just means you have tendencies more on this side or this side to some lesser or greater degree.
So I want you just by yourself for a moment, those of you who especially who aren’t familiar with this and even those who are, to reflect on some of these so that you can decide if you were to place yourself on one side or the other for the purpose of the exercise, not in terms of boxing you in a corner for the rest of your life, where would you be in your life? The introversion, extraversion is a kind of measure of where you source your mental energy. Yeah? So an extrovert initiates contact with others. They’re active.
They express thoughts and feelings. They like experiential knowing and learning, They’re often described as expressive, participative and initiating. Introversion receives from others, is reflective, offers calm succinct comments, enjoys written information, is often described as reflective, intimate and quiet. Those of you now I know that all of us will have all of those qualities to some degree. So but most of us will have a strength on one side or the other.
For those of you who inclined to think you have a strength on the introvert side, can you put up your hand? About half the room. And those on the extrovert side? About half. And those who didn’t put their hand up?
Okay. And and some of you will be really close into the center, and some of you will be right out on either side. Yep. And that can change over a lifetime where you where you put yourself. Okay.
The second polarity. So when you’re writing your now instead of calling yourself Sanguine or a Choleric or something like that when you identify your type this is at the basic level of MBTI you identify which of these letters you are first and you end up with four letters so the first one you’re either E or I okay second polar polarity is your preferred source of how you get information about the world. A sensing person focuses on facts, tangibles, likes to verify things, research data, enjoys customary and known activities, often described as concrete, realistic and practical. The person whose source of information is more intuitive these terms, in this typology, seeks meaning in ideas, mentally plays and events, enjoys novel, new, complex activities, often described as imaginative, imaginative, theoretical, conceptual. So who in the room would see themselves more on the sensing side?
Yep. A few people. And who in the room would see themselves more on the intuiting side? A few more people. And who don’t know where they are?
Good, mate. Yeah. Yeah. Good, Yep. And one of the things I think that’s interesting about this, sometimes it’s about the context we’re in.
So in certain contexts, you know, like when I’m doing my you know, I’m on my doctorate at the moment, I haven’t got to the crunching numbers part. But when I’m in the crunching numbers I mean, I used to be an accountant before I was a psychologist. And, you know I’ve actually got really good skills analytical numbers figures details blah blah blah so I can sit right in there and if that’s all you met me as that person that’s who you think I was but that is so far from home for me it’s actually straining on my personality. So sometimes we actually are sitting on one side or the other, but life just brings us into a place where we need to strengthen the other polarity. If we have the intellect and the will to do that, that’s what we do.
Other times, myself for an example, depends where you meet me. You know, if you meet me on retreat for sixteen months meditating five hours a day, you might think me an introvert. And if you meet me telling jokes and a speaking engagement, you might think me an extrovert. So you know? And it may be that I’m sitting somewhere in the middle.
Yeah? On this one, I’m actually naturally right out here. But I have actually developed really good skills here. So and sometimes we just don’t know. We we often talk about sixth sense.
Yes. Would you fit that in sensing? Or No. You put that in intuitive? I wouldn’t I wouldn’t I wouldn’t translate sixth sense as the six of the senses from Buddhism into this polarity in that way.
Like, it’s not a for me, it’s not a natural layover. Okay. Yeah? So the senses, these are about the five senses. The intuitive uses the five senses and sixth sense.
Yeah. But I wouldn’t lay it over quite so neatly. Thinking, feeling. This polarity is about our preferred decision making strategy those of you who know what you like. The thinking person prefers logic, systems, models, questions, seeks truth, wants fairness, uses sound arguments to confirm decisions.
They’re often described as critical, logical and questioning. The person who uses feeling to make their decision other hand, prefers ideals, people values, seeks harmony, tolerance, values interdependence, often described as empathic, accepting, accommodating. So for those of you who know, who would put yourself more on the thinking side? A few people. And who would put yourself more on the feeling side?
And who doesn’t know where they put themselves? Yep. I know. Both. In the middle.
Yep. In the middle. Yep. Both of you. So there’s partly sometimes you don’t know, and partly sometimes you just really are in the middle.
Yep? And partly sometimes, as I said, you know, when I’m in a working context, when I’m, you know, the manager of an organization and I’m very decisive, I make lots of logical decisions, everybody just assumes I’m this. But when I’m teaching the groups and working with people, everyone assumes I’m that. So, you know, we can adapt to our environment and sometimes we don’t actually understand where our strengths are. And sometimes we got both.
Yeah, Lindsay? One of the things that I’ve found in organisations who do this is that often people make assumptions about other people. Make those assumptions. I think it seems to sit with any typology, and especially Myers Briggs, and especially people who teach Myers Briggs. In my well, some.
Actually, that’s not true of all. Some. But it seems that some organisations, I think, probably have quite good teachers. People latch on to the I’m an ISTJ, you know, I can’t work with someone else who’s an I. Yeah.
It’s very unfortunate because the value of the is to see where our strengths are, to see the areas where we’re not so naturally talented, to see where the conflicts and the synergies work with other people, and to be able to work with them. So it’s actually meant to be a gift to say, oh, I’ve got my strengths in this area and you’ve got your strengths in that area. Fantastic. Come and talk to me because I need someone to do X. And the more I came to look at these things in my own life, the more I was able to go outward and say, I need this done.
And like my PA who, you know, who texts me on the way to tell me she’s done the Acrobat business on the website because, you know, the details is not my thing, which is more a sensing thing. So, you know, when you use these wisely, it’s not about your other. I can’t work with you. It’s your other. Fantastic.
How can we help each other? Yeah? Oh, this is really aggravating. Must be one of the ways in which you’re other. Or, in fact, you’re reflecting a mirror to part of myself that I don’t want to see and I’m really annoyed about.
You know? Any version thereof. The last one, judging, perceiving, it is called. Judging. This is the preferred style for managing external events, extroverted events, so things that are happening.
Judging, it’s a funny name, but what it means is judging people prefer order, structure, method, acts, plans, organizers, invites systematic procedures. They’re often described systematic, methodical, scheduled. Yeah. So they just organize themselves. They’re often good with a sense of timing.
Not always, but often. Yeah. The other side, perceiving. Prefers process, openness, likes flow, spontaneity, novelty, enjoys variety, improvisation, often described as casual, emergent, open ended. Yeah?
Perhaps often not so good at being decisive because they’re staying open to new ideas and perhaps not always being very good with timing. One of the things many many of you here know the MBTI and you use it already in your workplace. It’s one of the things that there are many struggles that people have, but this one, the judging, perceiving, is one of the biggest struggles that I see in a workplace. The people that are really good at being organized, have everything structured and done on time, and the people that don’t. People really judge these people badly.
These people feel like they’re really judged, and then they get really reactive to that. So that that’s a common struggle in a workplace. These people are often open to a little bit more creativity. These people will will stay focused on the task. Yeah?
So who in the room is more on the judging side? Yeah. And who in the room is more on the perceiving side? And who in the room is close in the middle or doesn’t know? Yeah.
Okay. Yeah. So that’s the MBTI for those of you who’ve ever heard about and want to work with it. And there are many, many books written on this and really going much more into depth about the strengths that you have and how you might more live into those strengths with the awareness of where you are and how you might better understand how to connect with other people whose strengths are in other areas, sometimes areas that really give you the pip. So what you end up with is something like, you know, IS t j or e n f p or any any of the versions of those.
So when you’re looking at your tip your type, you end up with a four letter code. Thank you. Is from intuitive because they’ve already got intuitive. Thank you for asking that. So I know it so well.
I forget. So Is there any in the way that they’re there, those two wings, do do they exist as columns or are they not there’s no connection between them and all? No. And in fact, when I was writing it up, I didn’t actually know that I’d written those two. It’s just must have been in my mind for when I wrote it on the board.
But there are any any any number of differences. This one here, these two here make a real difference. The NF, the n for intuitive and the f for feeling. They tend to be so much, much more the creative, intuitive, feeling, mushy kind of types, and the STs are much more facts, facts, research, detail, thinking, analytical types and those differences can generate a lot of dramas especially in relationships, especially in romantic relationships. In fact, they’re an incredible complement to each other, but the NF always thinks especially if it’s an NF woman, she always thinks he’s just completely inadequate and boring, and he thinks she’s off her face.
They are. Yeah, we know that, don’t we? And in the work environment, similar things start to happen. People, if rightly placed in the accounting department or the engineering department or in those places where you need really good sense and thinking skills ought to be there. And the intuitive feeling people ought to be working with people, creating ideas, doing stuff like that.
And if you’ve got them mixed up, it’ll be sucking the life out of people, there’ll be all manner of inner and outer conflicts in that process. And so we’ve come to the end of the evening and it’s been a very fast run through a couple of typologies and a reference to some other typologies and I’ll put a couple of the websites that refer to these typologies and also to the Enneagram and also to the Wealth Dynamics typology on the sheet on the website. So if you’re interested in following them up, I encourage you to continue being more and more aware. Adrian? Sorry.
When you finished? Have you finished that sentence? I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’m You’re drunk already. Okay.
Sorry. What were you gonna say? Yeah. Just thinking back to the title of this series of lectures Mhmm. Buddha in the boardroom.
Yes. And what you’ve given us today is a really neat and compact run through of a couple of different typologies. And got us to experience those for ourselves, which is great. And I mean that. Yes.
How how would you connect this then to the first part of that title? Ah, very good. Thank you, Adrianne. Where I started this evening was about our our lives are about leadership. Leadership is about vision and relationships and insight.
And so this is a part of having insight into ourselves. It’s a cognitive tool for having insight into ourselves. It’s another tool to have awareness with, that we can use mindfulness to watch our behavior rising, our reactions to other people rising, and where we’re good and where we’re not so skillful at things. So watching that whole process is an act of mindfulness. And with that act of awareness, we can make more insightful, wise choices that allow us to live into what we value the most, which is the wisdom aspect.
Thanks for asking the question. On that, I think I’ll finish. On the way out this handout with Acrobat and the courses of the Mindfulness Centre if you want it, and also Buddha House. Nice to see you all. Hope you had a nice evening.
Hope it was fun. Thank you.