Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. In this 38-minute teaching, Lama Lhundup addresses the foundation of Buddhist practice: using our human birth to benefit others rather than indulge in attachment and anger. He opens by rejecting sexual desire and harmful thoughts as unworthy pursuits, then guides listeners through cultivating respect, patience, and compassion as the basis for inner peace. The bulk of the talk is devoted to practical work with anger: recognizing it early, pausing before it escalates, examining its emptiness through meditation, and avoiding the trap of suppressed resentment that builds into grudges. He draws on his own experience disciplining children to illustrate the difference between wrathful action motivated by compassion and destructive action driven by anger. A student question on attachment to the opposite sex leads him to recommend emptiness meditation as an antidote. Throughout, Lama Lhundup emphasizes that our mind’s state determines our happiness far more than our circumstances, and that habituation through repeated reflection on the faults of afflictive emotions is the path to freedom.
File metadata (for organising)
File: 16 HY.mp3
UUID: 696c7494-caf7-438e-b0af-a41d6c924aa3
Teacher: Lama Lhundup
Collection: Helping yourself helping others (Lama Lhundup)
Date: 1987 (exact day not recorded)
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Duration: 37.9 minutes
Words: ~2,035
You know, we should think that I’m a human being and if I’m completely caught up in sexual desire attachment, even animals have this quality. This is not the most important quality that a human being can develop. So we should try to help one another. We should respect one another. We shouldn’t hold some far and some close, but we should try to benefit all equally.
This is the real purpose of having taken this human body, not to develop attachment and anger. Briefly, we should think that I’m a human being and both myself and others we want happiness. So therefore whoever we meet, whether it’s a male or a female, we should equally begin to abandon the thought of harming others, of hurting others, get rid of these thoughts and begin to cultivate the thoughts of developing to make use of our body, speech and mind and return the great kindness of others by giving them the happiness that they want by seeking to benefit them, to help them. So our actions should be in harmony with the Dharma, whether our actions of body and speech. Even though we might meditate, sit in meditation and think about trying to benefit others, but if in fact when we talk with others, when we work with others, if we don’t seek to develop the thought of benefiting them, that we only cause problems for others, then this is not the practice of Dharma.
So no matter whether it’s a man or a woman, we should think from our own side, What can I do to make this person happy? Can I do? How can I benefit this person And to develop, have them like me? Thinking this way constantly again and again your mind is going to change. So in general, whenever we are together, should always be developing patience, developing respect and love for one another.
So, in general, whether we’re in pleasant place or an unpleasant place, whatever appearance is the place we may take, if within our own mind, if we constantly examine our own mind, if we develop positive states of mind, then whatever the outside is like we’re going to be happy. If we have negative states, no matter what is outside of ourselves we’re going to be unhappy. So it’s most important, no matter what’s happening around us, for our mind to abide in peace, to develop a peaceful mind. So the basis of developing this peace within one’s own mind is to develop respect, love, patience, compassion for others. Without these practices we’re not going to have a peaceful mind.
Do you have questions? Do you have some questions? So, you know that you can develop anger very quickly, but now you have to begin to think that anger will bring you only suffering. Therefore, you meet someone, you should think, I must be careful about anger. Anger can only bring me suffering.
When you start anger, you don’t need to look person. Look to yourself first. Then after your anger is not rising, then what? Okay. You do.
It’s beneficial. No beneficial stuff. Oh, I’m sorry. That’s all. That’s more beneficial.
Yes. What if anger arises that is not recognized and is kind of suppressed. The anger is there, but it’s not recognized. It creates it builds up. That then it can maybe just explode all at once.
Mhmm. So is it better to if the anger can’t be recognized and analyzed and cut, is it better maybe to express a little bit of anger than to build up? No. You just you can really practice in a house angers, so then you can contemplate anger. Just some person just making an argument with you, shouting with you or something, you know?
And just you can practice how it’s a little bit old, then you recognize clearly. Oh, this is anger. So then when anytime they come in, then you can stop. I said, Western Western psychology often puts forward the idea that There is anger. That many of us carry a reservoir which has not been recognized and expressed.
Yeah. That’s but when anger comes anger comes, you don’t like develop. Anger comes, you realize, you know, you realize that you can just change even though you can just breathe in. You think, just maybe you can don’t move that time. No.
You don’t follow that one. Just come out, then shouting, then other’s anger rises. Shouting person, so then then they anger. You know? So, just better don’t come.
Just first, have you you rise and you recognize, you realize, and you look at how it’s look like. When you look through to anger, you will not come out. That that anger does not come out. Just contemplate. Gradually.
Stop. Then you can just hold them. You can slow breath down. Otherwise, you do bad things. Hold them by compassion when you show.
Action driven by anger. Anger in your time, you see. Then you can one time show, again, second coming. Yeah. Never stopping.
Better to stop first time. Difficult first time. Difficult. Try, try, try, try, try, try. Month, month, month, you know?
So then, afterwards it’s no problem. Kunsin. Kunsin. Kunsin.
Keeping that anger, no good. Anger is no good. It was keeping anger. Also, there’s no good. That added same Buddha said, no good.
There are, you know, six root delusions, twenty secondary. Secondary mind, twenty divisions. Kunsin, keeping anger.
Also, that is pollution. Anger pollution, keeping anger also. Yeah. This idea is good, but it’s just better you can try and it just will come out. I was thinking maybe the idea of the reservoir of anger was just thinking that the idea of of many Western psychologists is that this if anger is not expressed, but it’s suppressed, then then it builds up into a big pool.
So Mhmm. But I was thinking maybe if anger You can cry, you can practice. When there’s anger, just you just you can change as you know. You know? Just look, you know, just look through anger and how it looks like.
That just means it is impermanent. Also, not truly existent. Completely empty. You can realize empty anger by that time. You accept empty.
So then even anger is not there. How you keep, not exist there. But you just holding anger, no good. Just take time, come out. Come out.
Just make complete make destroyed. Come out. Come in, start, then you make it destroyed. Holding a grudge. Holding a grudge.
Yes. That’s what kunsin. Kunsin. What he means by holding anger is holding a grudge. Anger is always there.
Yeah. I think that’s sort of similar. It? Because one person is doing bad things. Firstly anger.
Again, you didn’t say, but it’s just study. You concept it is bad. So just mind don’t like looking him, you know? When you see him, you don’t like. So that means you’re caught in that anger.
You know? But first, you can just this anger may destroy. And after, just you can show it again. Okay? Otherwise, he’s going to you.
Then you just patience is, patience is finished. You shout. Okay. Right? That is different.
I use it with my boys. You know? I use it with anger, then easily they get angry. Without anger, when I shout him, not they rise anger. That’s due to my experience.
You know, people, I lost my temper with them. So they start angry, me start angry too much. So then I realized, I stop anger. So then they didn’t rise it, you know. Even they they they they anger, but doesn’t hurt.
That’s different. You can you can check out. You do one during your class. Lama, how do you how do you practice wrath or being wrathful but not being angry? Where do you think it is necessary?
Because otherwise they’re not even my boys, they’re not learning. They’re always playing and do bad action, bad things. And I’m responsible. Otherwise, they do bad habit. You know?
So so therefore, when their life becomes, you know, good things, losing, not get opportunity with life. So therefore, I’m responsible. Yeah. But but how how do we how do we, where necessary, be wrathful? How do we do it wrathful without anger?
Yeah. I mean, I have kids too. Yeah. And I have to, you know No. You just you just you you can think.
Even if learn, learning, learning things. No. Learning things. You can what kind? Too many things.
Natural words tending better, you can always do it nice. Sometimes need to be wrathful. They do good things. And sometimes you need to show wrath. No.
Different people is energy. You know? So some sometime need person to be thoughtful, then they are afraid. You know? You know?
Otherwise, they never do, you know, just wish you love. Just, you know, then all them pray. Know? They authentic, you know, we need just children need some radical. Radford, very, very hard.
You know, my teachers showed many wrathful actions. Then So you’re saying that if there is any feeling of anger, then no action. Wait and cut that. When you anger, don’t talk. Quiet and check yourself.
What about attachment, Lama? I find attachment arises so often. You mentioned in the company of people, constantly I find attachment arising particularly to the opposite sex. I think to myself, Well, you know, I’m not relating. I’m not sort of choosing to relate.
Sensibly. I’m just sort of seeing an object that has Not too much. Not too much. Not too much think that. Think what? Not too much think that.
I don’t understand what If we develop a powerful attachment, then we have to have a powerful antidote to that attachment. If we have great anger, have to make use of a great antidote to anger. Until we have abandoned the afflicted emotions, will not attain any liberation, Buddhahood, or complete happiness. So, we should be developing the mind which thinks to benefit one’s self and others, and we should try to diminish the thoughts which actually bring harm to oneself and others. Therefore, we have to think about the disadvantages of these afflictive emotions which bring harm to yourself and to others.
Through habituation we have sexual desires, we have all these afflictive emotions, we seek all these various types of contaminated But what we should always be doing is to be thinking about how to benefit others. For example, with sexual desire, we can use the antidote of thinking about emptiness, meditating emptiness. This is beneficial. Completely, you realize emptiness? Yeah?
I’m going back to something that was said earlier. When I guess the earlier that you can recognize anger, for example, the earlier one is able to deal with it, the better to deal with it. Are there any sort of practices? That’s just unique, you know, everyday practice. Then you can easily stop it.
Your So, we should always be thinking about the disadvantages of anger. So, again and again, think about the disadvantages of anger. Think that there is no reason for becoming angry. Thinking this way again and again, over and over, you will get to the place where you will be able to cease anger the moment it arises. Okay.
Yeah? Okay. Good. Mhmm. I’m getting back to an earlier question on at the child that won’t do what it’s told, that that would in some way hurt the child?
I mean, even even without a That’s right. No, there’s just some reason, Some reason why as we need some time, some children, not obstinate. Sometime, they just doing bad things. Just you some boy, you just turn nicely. Difficult.
Maybe different than the western children. Do. East children maybe a little bit different. So East people, just difficult. So then very radical is sometimes made very important.
You know? You know, some boys need show wrathful, then will become worse. So this kind of boy can always need just very nice. Yes. This depends on you.
Okay. So now