Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. Opening with the Indian master Śāntideva’s image of human life as a ship crossing a great ocean, Khensur Rinpoche argues in this 89-minute talk that love and compassion are the most productive form of spiritual practice. He draws a parallel between secular education and Dharma training, defines compassion as the unbiased wish that all beings be free from suffering, and contrasts it with the partial caring even animals show their young. A vivid section on anger follows — how it robs even a gentle person of peace, ruins the flavor of food, and destroys accumulated good karma. The Q&A addresses whether anger is ever justified when wronged, how to distinguish compassion from attachment (illustrated with a coveted suit and a remembered steak), and whether Mahāyāna Buddhism permits killing an animal out of compassion. Accessible to a general audience with no prior Buddhist knowledge.
File metadata (for organising)
File: 06 1989 03 19 PT Compassion in everyday life.mp3
UUID: 8fb1eaa7-2155-42f5-b74f-6bec68468028
Teacher: Khensur Rinpoche
Collection: Public Talks 1988-2003 (Khensur Rinpoche)
Date: 1989-03-19
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Duration: 88.7 minutes
Words: ~4,792
So if if together we can adjust our motivation such that you’re listening to this this particular teaching on the Dharma, the methods of spiritual progress with a an altruistic intention to benefit others and I myself for my part will will speak and discuss the Dharma with an altruism that is with a beneficial intention. Then together we can create a great deal of positive potential, great deal of positive energy and our action will be extremely skillful. So from a quotation from the great master Śāntideva in speaking about the various types of sentient beings in this world, various types of the creatures which inhabit our world that amongst all the various varieties that we are extremely fortunate in having attained a human embodiment that we are all human beings. So if we by way of analogy and talking about our human embodiment. It’s as if we have a ship which is crossing a great ocean.
Without, you know, depending upon this this ship then there’s no way we can get to the other shore. So our human embodiment being a human being is very much like that ship. And just as in the case of crossing a great ocean to get to the other shore, it’s necessary to rely on a great vessel that is a ship. Likewise, crossing the great ocean of our dissatisfactory quality of our present existence, it’s necessary to make use of this human embodiment as a vessel to cross over to happiness. Just as in the case of when we have a good vessel and crossing over to the other shore it’s quite quite easily the journey is can be quite easy and likewise in our spiritual pursuits and seeking to find the happiness crossing over our present qualities of dissatisfactory existence and dependence upon the human embodiment we can quite easily cross over to that shore of happiness.
So it’s necessary to appreciate the very fact that we are human beings and understanding that it is through such an embodiment that we can go beyond our present dissatisfactory quality of our existence and find the happiness that we’re looking for. And we’re to appreciate the great capacity that we all possess as human beings, that we have the ability, that we have the power within us to find the happiness that we’re all looking for and to eliminate the suffering which none of us want. So coming to appreciate the great fortune that we have, the great potential that we have in going beyond the dissatisfactory quality of our existence and finding happiness that we all seek. But in essence that perhaps we’re confused about the methods of finding happiness. Perhaps we don’t know the actual progress along the path to happiness.
And so it’s necessary to begin the process of training or transforming our mind. And it’s necessary to keep reminding ourselves of our capacity so that we don’t fall asleep. That we don’t waste our time in making use of this quality that we possess. So in order to eliminate our dissatisfaction and find the happiness that we all want, we have to begin the process of transformation and we have to train our minds. So amongst the various types of trainings that we can involve ourselves in there is simply the types of worldly training, secular and then there’s non secular of there is the spiritual pursuits of training.
In the in the worldly sense, in the training process that we’ve all gone through that for example in our schooling and gaining education that we we began at the very beginning learning the alphabet And upon familiarization with the alphabet then we went on and we learned the grammar and learning how to read all the various knowledges that we learned along the way, the various aspects of our culture. And finally, we we trained ourselves and now we’re comparatively educated people. And having trained ourselves in this way from an early age that we’ve developed various skills, in our occupations that we are able to take advantage of serving others that others actually we are benefit to others as others appreciate our skills and make use of our services and it’s a mutually beneficial situation. So if we become very skillful in our occupation that we become proficient in our profession, then others are quite willingly others will quite willingly hire us to work for them and we can enjoy our our work, the type of work and we can we don’t have to work very hard in our profession and we get a big salary. So in this way in training ourselves to become proficient in our particular professions then we can enjoy a lot of material benefits.
We can enjoy general benefits in general that we perhaps we can have a, you know, a very nice house, we can have a good car, we can have stylish clothing, we can have delicious food and other people like us and they enjoy being around us. So even in this worldly sense we can see that training and study is of extremely great importance. So in this way and this and even in a worldly sense that training, educating ourselves, study, We benefit not only ourselves but we also benefit others that our our life is has less difficulties and we can find a great deal of material prosperity. So if on the other hand that if we don’t engage in any type of training, any type of educational process, study for example, that we’ll end up unskilled, that it would be difficult for us to get any type of good work which might interest us, that we’ll have to probably perform some types of menial work which we won’t be satisfied with and things will be difficult for us. So understanding that perhaps if we don’t undergo some kind of type of training and various types of study, even in the worldly sense, then we’re going to have to be forced to employ ourselves in menial types of work that and then dependence upon that we are going to have to be to get along with poor poor quality, perhaps food, clothing, health, housing, transportation.
Perhaps we won’t enjoy our work and we want others will not appreciate us for for our abilities. So in this way, we can see all the drawbacks from not training ourselves and pursuing some course of study. So but now, perhaps most of that opportunity has passed us. Whatever we have marked out for ourselves and with our life through in our secular training, through our study, Now it becomes more and more difficult to find the time to pursue any type of course of training or study. And so it’s extremely beneficial now to begin to turn our mind toward a different type of training that is training in spiritual pursuits.
So when we talk about spiritual practice, we generally use the word Dharma. So what does what does Dharma mean? Dharma means to to is measured by way of one’s conduct through body, speech, mind. Whether one’s types of conduct are skillful, whether they’re productive, whether they’re beneficial. In this way, types of activities of body, speech, and mind improve ourselves and others are beneficial, are productive, are skillful, then this is a type of Dharma conduct or spiritual practice.
And we talked about the various types of Dharma, the various types of spiritual practice that these various types of conduct which are productive, are skillful, then the essence or the main type of conduct, the main type of practice of spiritual pursuit is embodied in love and compassion. And it is love and compassion which is of the greatest benefit, which is which is the greatest skillful means, and which is the most productive of all the various activities that we can engage in in our in our spiritual life. So, you know, if we talk about what is it within dharma which is the most beneficial? What is it that is the most help to others and to ourselves? What is it that is most altruistic?
What is it that is going to help us not to waste our life, our time? What is it that is going to help us to advance most quickly and would be of greatest productivity to ourselves is the qualities of loving compassion. You know, we can see the direct benefits from such a way from such a type of quality to train ourselves in simply in the relationship of a husband and wife that if the husband and the wife have mutual trust, mutual caring, a mutual love between one another, then they’re going to have a harmonious, mutually productive, beneficial relationship. So two people have come together due to the power of the results of their karma, their various actions that they’ve created in the past and now they live together in one single home. If they don’t care for one another, if they don’t trust one another, if they aren’t loving toward one another, then they’re going to drift apart.
There’s going to be create a distance between them. And though their karma is forcing them to live together, their force of their non caring, non trust is going to force them apart and this is a very difficult unharmonious situation which can cause only unhappiness to both the husband and the wife. So within a home if there’s caring between the parents, the husband and the wife then there can only be harmony. There will only be fitting together of their purposes in life. There will be no disharmony.
If there’s love in that home then there’s going to be harmony. There’s going to be no no disharmony in that home. And in such a type of home, there can there will only be happiness and this will be a benefit to even the children who will will grow up in a with positive qualities and in such a type of atmosphere is can be completely happy. So in this harmony spreads out not just from the home but beginning to spread out to the surroundings, to your friends, to the area in which you live in and to your entire country. This harmony which this type of relationship produces.
This atmosphere of harmony which is being radiated out from one individual’s home spreading out, you know if we can begin to if people can begin to care about one another to develop love and trust in one another then this can not only work between individuals but it can also work between nations and in such a situation a in a atmosphere of mutual trust, mutual concern for the for the benefit of others, then we don’t need all these various weapons that we’ve created that we can live without fear and destruction. And the world can can live in peace. So the root or the foundation of all this is love and compassion. So, what is what do we mean by compassion? Compassion is the kind heart which, upon seeing someone without happiness who is being tortured by some type of suffering, there arises the thought: may that sentient being, whoever they might be, may they be separated from that suffering.
May they not undergo that difficulty. This is compassion. So, you know, this type of compassion that we’re talking about is simply not directed toward a few a few close the few that are close to us. All sentient beings without exception want happiness, that no being wants to suffer, that we’re all very much the same in this regard, and that the type of compassion we’re talking about is directed toward all types of sentient beings equally and wishing them that they all be separated from any type of suffering. If on the other hand, the type of compassion that we’re trying to develop is biased that is simply directed toward our loved ones or those who we are friends with simply thinking that I wouldn’t I would like to see them be separated from the suffering wouldn’t that be wonderful?
But my enemies I I care less about them. This is this is not really the type of compassion that we are seeking to develop but the type of compassion which is directed toward all sentient beings equally. You know, such a type of biased compassion, we could call it, which is simply directed toward those we hold dear, those we hold close, our friends, our children, our spouse. Even such a type of compassion is found amongst those who are not particularly pursuing a spiritual path. Those who aren’t even practicing Dharma, who are not trying to practice Dharma.
They have this type of compassion wishing their spouse, their children, their friends to be separated from their suffering. Even animals have this type of compassion — a mother of any type of creature will seek to eliminate the suffering of its offspring. So we begin with ourselves as taking ourselves as an example or a basis for illustrating this quality of this not wanting suffering. That, you know, whenever we experience any dissatisfaction, any difficulty, we don’t like it. We don’t want it.
We want to be separated from this any difficulties, any feelings of dissatisfaction or suffering. Taking this as an example and and extrapolating from ourselves to the situation of others and understanding that all sentient beings regardless of their type, regardless of any superficial quality are exactly like ourselves. No different. They all want happiness. None of them want to suffer just like ourselves and developing this quality of our compassion which is able to observe all sentient beings without all the various varieties and types without any bias and wishing them that may not suffer.
This same quality necessarily applies to the type of love that we’re seeking to develop. And by love is the wish that others be happy. And that but this type of love is not simply directed toward our children, our spouse, those our friends. Again, this type of love is even common to those who do not particularly seeking a spiritual path and it’s even common to those who to the various to animals who wish their offspring to have happiness, to whatever will bring them satisfaction. Those who are seeking a spiritual path and seeking to develop this the love in which we’re discussing, it’s necessary to again to observe all sentient beings regardless of any of their superficial qualities, their various varieties and type.
And simply understanding that that most of these people aren’t happy, that they they could always be happier, that they want happiness and simply wishing all sentient beings without any qualification, without any bias, may they be happy. So if we can develop such an attitude as the as love and compassion in this sense that we’re discussing, then toward all sentient beings, then no matter who the person or who the sentient being might be, we’re going to have a harmonious relationship with them. We’re going to have a mutually beneficial relationship with them. We’re going to have the attitude of caring, the attitude of benefiting them, of seeking to help them. With such an attitude, this caring, this benefiting attitude, then we simply will not engage in the various actions of body, speech, mind which would cause others harm, which would bring which would hurt others.
You know, we wouldn’t kill others, we wouldn’t steal from them, we wouldn’t lie from them. And this way through the power of love and compassion, all the various unskillful and unproductive qualities of our activities of body, speech, and mind cease of themselves. With such a type of attitude then all the various faults, all the various unskilled activities of body, speech and mind begin to cease of themselves and that in their place are very productive, skillful act activities and our mind naturally becomes happy and we have a harmonious mutually beneficial relationship with others. But in the meanwhile the one of the great faults of everyone and especially those who are seeking to practice the Dharma, practice the spiritual path is the fault of anger which can arise. So, you know, for those who, you know, we could be sitting quite happily, quite peacefully and for one reason or another some condition arises and we become angry.
And immediately our peace is gone, our happiness of our mind is gone and in its place is suffering, dissatisfaction. We become red in the face, we become angry and, you know, we develop not only mental unrest, mental dissatisfaction, but it also harms our even our our physical health. In such a situation, those who are quite prone to anger, things life becomes very difficult for them, you know. They may have set before them some kind of delicious food, but but an angry person cannot even taste its flavor. You may you may be very tired, but you can’t sleep.
That everyone around you that you you have difficulty with, everybody causes you problems it seems. Even your friends cause you nothing but trouble and anger. Even someone who is under who is usually a very kind hearted person, someone who’s quite well mannered, quite gentle person, even for such a type of person who generally has a good disposition, immediately upon becoming angry, then everything goes, everything becomes difficult for them. They no longer able to, they have conflicts with everyone, even the people that they usually care about a great deal, that they aren’t able to exist in a harmonious situation with them, that everyone begins to present problems for them. They immediately begin to speak harsh words toward everyone.
And so it’s sort of we’re sort of enslaved or taken under the control of anger even a person who generally has a good disposition. So, you know, we have to to make effort in seeking to not allow anger to arise, and if when it does arise, to pacify it as quickly as possible. We have to make apply antidotes. So we have to think about the great negativity of anger in itself that even the generally a good hearted person that someone is generally happy upon developing anger immediately their mind is unpeaceful, immediately their mind is is in a state of suffering. And not only are they suffering, but immediately they begin to bring suffering to those immediately around them.
That even more than this, than the immediate suffering work that we’re experiencing, we’re creating suffering for the future and that any type of positive potential that we’ve created in the past, we’re destroying that. So first we have to think about all the great faults, the drawbacks of became of becoming angry and begin to exercise the the will to and and apply the various antidotes to cease it. After having done that, seeking to prevent anger, then we develop the thinking about the advantages, the positive qualities of love. That it it it is the preciousness of love that it benefits not only oneself, but it also is of great benefit to others. So, you know, we’ve explained very roughly some of the things that we can begin to think about — the disadvantages of anger, the negativity of anger, and the advantages of the qualities of love and compassion, the positive qualities of love and compassion.
And that keeping these in mind and just sort of going over within your own experience, the what anger has done for you and what love has done for you, that we can we’re going to just meditate for about five minutes and simply recollect the thoughts. When we talk about compassion, it simply is directed toward all sentient beings, may you be separated from suffering. The wish may be separated from suffering. And to direct love toward all sentient beings, the wish, the thought, may you have happiness, that we’re going to spend just a few minutes in meditation. So we can spend some time answering questions, if you have some questions.
Yeah. Okay. Is if someone if someone does something bad to you, then what’s wrong with being angry as a response? Yeah. And they continue to be bad.
Such as such as lying to you. So becoming no matter what the badness of the activity of the other person, it’s inappropriate to respond with anger since it it it immediately makes you unhappy to be angry. It doesn’t it doesn’t harm in any way the other person, it only hurts yourself. And it also has the disadvantage of any sort of positive potential, any skillful karma that you’ve created in the past is destroyed through the force of your own anger. On the other hand, no matter what negativity might the other person might direct towards you if you can if you cultivate love then anger will never arise.
Yes. And detached. So the the two, compassion and attachment, are actually unrelated to one another. They they don’t necessarily have to be mixed with one with one another. In in developing compassion, we observe the suffering of another person.
And the the observing that, we develop the wish, you know, may be separated. May you not experience that suffering. When we so this isn’t completely unrelated with any type of attachment. When the attachment arises when we when we observe not their suffering, but some desirable quality which we see can bring us ourselves happiness. That something about them, some attribute which we see as pleasing and which is desirable, likable, and and this acts as the object of observation which causes the creation, development of attachment.
Observing suffering, we will never develop attachment if if it’s actual compassion. Yes. During their life and after their death projected towards humanity have a very serious effect? Upon the object of their anger. Does that — I lost it there.
Had it for more. Does that anger, what, have a negative result to the various object of the people who were yeah. So it it you know, the the anger, you know, whatever an animal, for in this case, only hurts the the animal themself. Only hurts the person themselves. It doesn’t harm the world in general or the object of that which it’s generating anger toward.
Yes. So the initial root cause or reason for the development of compassion and the development of attachment are quite dissimilar. If we understand the way the mind is operating with respect to its object then we will be able to quite easily distinguish between attachment and compassion or attachment and love. The initial motivating force for the development of these states of mind are quite different. In the case of attachment, attachment is a misconception or wrong conception as to the nature of the object.
It is superimposing qualities which in fact are not present in that object. Whereas in the case of compassion, it actually understands the nature of the object well. So one is a misconception, a wrong conception with respect to the object, and the other understands the object well and is in according with the real situation of the object, the nature of the object. So there are many, many dissimilarities between attachment and compassion. Are dissimilarities in subtlety and coarseness and dissimilarity in their actual nature.
Yes. What were the last few sentences? So where does the factor of attachment come in? Then the relationship is finished. Again.
So you have the through the force of previous actions or karma, you have come into a relationship in this life with a particular person. Now, again in this life, you’re creating karma with that person. You’re creating the the activity of the As a relationship is again, is a type of action creating more karma. So even though the karma from previous existences to be with this person may have exhausted upon death because of the karma that you’re creating in this life, again, causes a force which will bring you in together again in future relationship, in a future life. So therefore, becomes important what type of relationships we develop in this life because it’s going to determine the type of relationships are going to happen in the future.
And in this respect, if we, for example, say prayers that those who we wish to have a harmonious relationship in the future, this will act as a mitigating force to bring about a harmonious relationship in the future through the force of these prayers, this karma, this action. So, you know we’re talking about the quality the dissimilarity between attachment and compassion. Just by way of example, if you went downtown and you’re just walking around looking at the shop windows and you saw know, maybe I don’t know, whatever you’re into. You saw some some beautiful beautiful clothing. Okay?
It’s all wow. Look at that suit. That’s really nice color, nice fabric. And you really thought how wonderful it was. You would develop attachment toward that suit.
Yeah. That piece of clothing, but you wouldn’t develop compassion for it. So there’s this difference between compassion and attachment. So likewise, some type of food maybe you like steak and you say, wow, that was I had a great steak the other night. I love to have that again.
And you think about it and you you would develop a attachment or desire to have that delicious meal again. This isn’t compassion. Yes. So amongst the Tibetan people, there there we could say there are two types. There’s the one type who understands the nature of the spiritual reality and understanding what they are experiencing and why it has come about.
And such a type of individual could easily develop compassion for the Chinese. Now, there’s the other type of Tibetan person who doesn’t understand the nature of the spiritual reality, doesn’t understand dharma. And for them, all they could think about was that they had their homeland taken away from them that they had their country destroyed and everything has been lost. And for such a person they couldn’t develop compassion but in fact they would develop a great deal of hatred. So two possibilities.
Yes. So, this type of compassion that we were speaking of is the initial level of compassion where one simply wishes that others be separated from their suffering. As one one’s compassion develops in its force, eventually it would develop into the compassion which is called exceptional resolve, in which one resolves to that I take responsibility to eliminate that person’s suffering. And it necessitates some kind of action on one’s own part. So this is the fully blown, you might say matured compassion as compared to simply the wish, which is an initial compassion.
So there’s many levels in the development of compassion that we go through, that we increase its strength, its power. And so all these various possibilities from a mere wish to taking responsibility in action. Yeah. With compassion, you mentioned just now a state as an example of a delicious meal. If you were to have compassion for the animal which is suffering, should we not therefore be patient?
So that would be very good. So in general, plants are not sentient beings. But there are some types of sentient beings due to the force of their karma have appear as plants, have the appearance of plants, embodiment of plants. But in general, plants are not sentient beings. So Rinpoche went to you know, has been visiting zoos and things like this and seen many types of, you know, animals and creatures which appear very much like plants.
And I I you know, like some some insects, some appear like sticks, Some of them appear like flowers. So this They have this appearance, So these are these aren’t actually plants. They’re sentient beings. So do you have any Questions? Yeah.
By take away, you mean kill? Yeah. So within the context of the Mahāyāna, the great vehicle, if out of compassion for that particular animal that you see that because it’s through its harming these other type of other varieties of animals that it’s creating a great deal of negativity for itself, bad karma for itself. And this is going to cause rebirth in a hell realm. And you have great compassion for that animal because you don’t want to see it suffer in the future.
If within that as with that as a motivating force, then there are cases where it would be acceptable to kill that animal. Without that motivating force of compassion, it’s not acceptable.