Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. In this 46-minute session from an Art of Dying weekend workshop, Khensur Rinpoche offers a memorable image for the mind at death: like a dandelion clock, it drifts unanchored and susceptible to every passing influence — which is why intentional practice now matters. The session’s main focus is a guided Phowa (transference-of-consciousness) practice drawn from Sogyal Rinpoche’s Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, walking participants through visualizing a radiant divine presence, receiving purifying light, and dissolving their consciousness into that presence. Practical bedside guidance covers encouraging positive reflection in the dying, avoiding imposed beliefs, and performing Phowa silently at the bedside. Two closing exercises make the instruction embodied: a silent partner practice where one person lies down as the dying one while the other holds their hand, and an exchange-self-for-others meditation that ends with imagining being the dying person looking back at oneself.
File metadata (for organising)
File: 10 A of D 1993 08 07.mp3
UUID: 28323c04-53c3-4d77-af56-ecd1aff461b6
Teacher: Khensur Rinpoche
Collection: Art of Dying Workshop (Khensur Rinpoche)
Date: 1993-08-07
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Duration: 45.9 minutes
Words: ~4,716
Wiggle your toes, have a sense of how relaxed your feet are. You can even tighten your feet and then let them go. Your calves, tighten your calves, let them go. Your thighs breathing in as you tighten your muscles and breathing out as you relax them. Even taking some deep breaths and imagine as you breathe out all the tension flowing out with them then around your bottom area tighten tighten that and let it go your tummy tighten that and let it go noticing how we so often hold tension there by keeping our tummies held in and our chest area tighten all that area and let it go hands make a fist let it go yeah whole arm arms shoulders that very usual tense tight spot up in the back of one’s neck and let it go.
And your head screw up your eyes, frown, and then let it go. Just look through your body and look at where there are any tight or painful spots. If you’ve actually got some small area of pain or just tightness, Focus on that. So where is it in your body? Is it close to the skin?
Or is it right deep inside your abdomen or inside your big thigh muscle or in your lower back? Where is it exactly? What shape is it? Is it like a ball or a sphere or a rod? What shape is it?
Now be aware of its size. How long is it? How wide? And how deep is it? What is its size?
Through an exercise like this, if you find your mind wandering, that’s fine. Just return your concentration to the breath when you remember. Now be aware of its density. Is it very dense? Is it solid or light?
Is it all the same all the way through? Now what does it feel like If you were to take it out and touch it, what would it feel like? What’s its surface texture? Is it soft or fuzzy or rough or hard or smooth? What temperature is it?
Is it actually hot or cold? Is it a different temperature from the rest of your body, or is it the same? What color is it? If it feels a bit vague, imagine what color it would be, if you could really think about it. Now focus on the breath.
And for three rounds of the in out of breathing, imagine drawing the breath into the body and using it to wash around the area you’ve identified. Then for the next three rounds of breathing, imagine that the breath is drawn inside the area identified and it washes around the inside. Then the breath ebbs away with the exhalation. And then for the last three rounds of breathing, or it can be more than that, focus on the breath again or washing around the outside of the area. And it’s sometimes a common technique that’s used in the Tibetan Buddhist meditation is imagine the pain as black smoke and breathe it out every time you breathe out all the tightness.
You can even imagine them as negativities things that you haven’t been happy about doing in your past So bring your attention back now to the breath and then begin to have a sense of awareness of your body and the rest of your body and the room and then open your eyes Okay. There’s a copy of this that you’ll get for your folders. I’ll get it at lunchtime. And do you think that it’s the sort of thing that you could use with others? Yes, I think it’s quite a useful technique.
So now we’ll break into small groups just for half an hour. This session we want to look at some practical techniques for how to help the dying. What I’m going to do is first of all talk about the importance of being in touch with your own feelings, beliefs and ideas about dying first and then I’ll lead you through the Powa practice which is a fairly, potentially very profound practice. Sogyal Rinpoche, in his book, the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying’, has written very simply and clearly. And I’ll take you through that.
I’ve got a sheet to hand out to you when I’ve done this too. And then I’ve got another exercise that we’ll do, and then we’ll discuss that in the small groups afterwards. So to start with, I just wanted to talk for a moment about the importance of really being in touch with one’s own feelings. I’m going to quote from Pende Hawter, who spoke to the friends of the hospice, the South Australian Hospice Association. He was brought down by them recently.
For those of you who don’t know, he runs a hospice in Brisbane and he is a Buddhist monk, he’s a westerner, and he’s a physiotherapist by training and has developed a really wonderful hospice setup and he’s a very wonderful speaker. He talks about how important it is to confront one’s own death. This is a repetition of what we’ve done a bit through this weekend. We need to think about our feelings about AIDS, about deformity, about cancer first, before we actually are confronted with working with people with those diseases. We need to be able to allow the patient to talk about it and explore the issue, and sound them out about what they really feel about it.
We have to feel comfortable enough to be able to talk openly about these things it’s absolutely crucial, as has been said before, that we don’t impose our own beliefs on the person we need to recognise the limitations of what we can do and refer the person to someone else if we feel like we’re getting into deep water and we can’t cope. He talked about how people do have a lot of control over when they die, often when loved ones go out of the room, as we’ve talked about. So he says, Be open to where the patient is at. Don’t pose your own values or beliefs. Be non judgmental.
Be and don’t do. The exercise that we’ll do shortly will be a being exercise. Help the person to die in a calm and peaceful manner with their favourite foods or the loved ones around them if they want and with a happy mind and avoid situations that cause attachment or anger If they have this before they die, will hold them back and hinder the whole dying process. I think we’ve said all this before. To have weeping and wailing in the room will be a hindrance of the process of transition.
And meditators will prefer to die alone or with Dharma friends around them. One of the things that I realized very sadly when I was contemplating death before I had separated was that, in fact, I didn’t want my husband around me when I died. I only wanted my Dharma friends. It made me feel really sad, I must say. But I was aware of how important that process is to me.
He also says to encourage positive thoughts. In the notes that I’ve written from Sogyal Rinpoche’s book, he says, ‘Remember to inspire yourself when you don’t know what to do, pray and meditate to the being whose sacred power you believe in and if you don’t know what you believe in, it can be the sun or it can be your own wisdom, you know, but in a sense visualise something that you can have in your mind’s eye that is the essence of wisdom. So pray to them, see them in a glory of light and love above the dying person pouring down love and light and purifying them of their past suffering and present agony. Keep praying that the person should be spared further suffering and find peace and liberation. And I think that for those of you who’ve only just begun with learning to visualise, just do what you can.
But often, practicing visualising, light and pouring down on a person or whatever is actually a bit of an art, but it can be done, and it is incredibly powerful. Secondly, listen and let the person talk. Everyone has their own life wisdom. One can often help the dying person to help themselves by helping them to discover their own truth. The sources of healing are deep within each of us.
Our task is never to impose their own beliefs, but to enable the dying to find their own inner truth. Which often, as you know, they actually will find, even though they might have had a lifetime of unhappiness. When talking with the dying person, dwell on what they’ve achieved their good qualities helping them to feel as positive and constructive about their life as possible. What is it that you’ve achieved in your life? And in fact, one of the things that I found very valuable think about, was, something that Ian Gawler did with us, was to, think about what you’d say at your own funeral.
And we all thought, this is a bit dreadful. But we sat there and then, you know, and you and we had to think about what how our lives had been and what we had achieved. It’s It’s very easy to focus on the negatives, you know, in our lives. And then another person said to me, Just imagine that you’re ninety years old and you’re looking back on your life, what would you say about your life? And I found those incredibly valuable.
And so in the same way that we can say to a person who’s dying what is it that you’ve achieved and if you know them or know bits and pieces about them you can actually highlight things and draw things out for them because of course people who are dying are really vulnerable to regrets and doubts and feel overwhelmed often feel overwhelmed even the living feel overwhelmed with all their past mistakes And the essence of assisting someone is helping them to have a peaceful, dying process. So remind the person of the goodness of their true nature. That doesn’t mean beating them over the head about it, saying, you must realise this, and you must understand this, ‘ but to be saying it in a way that really fits for them. And I guess it involves a great deal of sensitivity and skill in being able to do that. If the dying person is familiar with meditating, encourage them to rest in meditation as much as possible.
If they’re not, try to find if they do have a spiritual practice. Obviously, that’s something that’s good to be found out before they’re really reaching the final stages. So that if you haven’t developed a relationship with them over the few weeks, then you’ve got time to find out what sort of things are important. And even if they haven’t got a religion or anything like that, of course, you could say that everyone does have a, you know, the ability to be spiritual, to have to think about things beyond the hearer and now. And you can know that it’s quite possible that you can help someone find that direction.
Then, Sogyal Rinpoche talks about this P H O W A. I don’t know, what does it mean? Transference of consciousness? Transference. So, he talks he says this is a simple but essential practice to do to prepare for our own death and to help those dying as well as loved ones who have already died.
Can you talk for a moment about what transference of consciousness means? The transference of a consciousness. What do we mean? Lot of I guess, you know, our our consciousness is going to be transferred one way or another. So perhaps beginning to exercise some control over the process.
And, you know, the the mind as it begins to you know, it’s it’s the bond between body and mind is weakening and finally it’s broken. And the the mind is as if set adrift. It’s no longer anchored into a very powerful identity. It’s associated itself with the body itself with the body. And it’s very vulnerable in such a state.
You know, it’s like kind of like a these little puffs of dandelion, what are they? The top is numbered. They call clocks. They call them clocks? Clocks.
Know, it’s the the slightest breeze can send in in one way or one direction or another. You know, we were talking about previously whether prayer is for someone. You know, the the mind is in a very susceptible state. It’s very vulnerable, which can act positively or negatively depending upon the environment what’s taking place. It’s lost its anchor.
And if we can at least give it some kind of direction and we can premeditatively have the power to send it in a specific direction, to give us some directionality. I kinda emphasize this idea that the mind is dynamic. It’s always moving. It’s not a steady fixed thing which is kind of, you know, absorbs the the world about it but it is interacting and it has some kind of directionality. It’s always in movement.
If we can give it some kind of directionality, then we can overcome any It can be strong enough to to that it won’t be susceptible to to negative or detrimental types of influences which might be occurring around or within the mind itself. And what so in in the Phowa, in the transference of consciousness, what would be your idea of the most beautiful place that you could take yourself? An idyllic place, a very beautiful place. You know, even setting aside spiritual aspirations. Some kind of, you even a material paradise.
And so the you know, at least the mind is isn’t going to the mind has some kind of at least a minimal type of direction towards something which would be termed positive as an outcome. It’s not completely bewildered and it’s not susceptible to every arising of every figment of our imagination which arises, which comes up in our mind. It does have some kind of directionality to it. So even if it was in terms of some kind of paradise, a celestial land, and you’re that that would be preferable to being vulnerable to all the various arising which are going to occur. And it’s like giving in a dream, how much control do we have?
And may perhaps we can set into motion the type of dream that we want to experience so our mind does evolve a certain type of outcome. So here in the transference consciousness, we’re trying to give the mind a direction to something a very favorable state. And also, know, mentioned about the at the moment of death is a very critical moment in the life of an individual. The states of mind which arise at that moment plays a dominant part in the quality of what’s going to come after. Some type of karma will be activated.
And so if we’re the mind some kind of spiritual direction and trying to aspire toward some actual physical place which is symbolic of their spiritual journey and its outcome, then types of karma which will facilitate that eventual result can be activated. And then we can exercise that much control. And then the process will hopefully carry itself. So we’re giving the mind some kind of impetus toward a particular direction. You know, not necessarily in space but also in space.
But also in terms of the way it’s directed out of the body. But also in terms of the tendencies and the act what types of karma will be activated. And then what kind of process it will unfold. Thank you, Jennifer. Sorry to put you on the spot.
And I think that the essence of this is that we think about these things now, so that when the time comes, then our mind, having been habituated to be thinking in this direction, taking this positive direction, will automatically take that, rather than take the direction that it would naturally have taken if we hadn’t been prepared. Now, guess that here, what I’ll do is lead you through this practice, the more detailed practice. And then there’s an abbreviated one that I’ll tell you about. And then there’s can also use it with being close to those who are dying as well. So, if you’d just like to get into a comfortable position, into a, you know, whatever position is most comfortable for you for meditating.
And, close your eyes, and just take a note of how your body is. One of the things that, has been really emphasised to me since in doing these courses at the Gawler Foundation is the importance of being physically relaxed. And I think it’s often very good to pay, at least five minutes attention to going through your body and looking at where the tense spots are, then, literally breathing out tension and concentrating and breathing it out as black smoke. So we will spend, let’s say, three minutes doing that now. So imagine in your mind’s eye, in the sky in front of you invoke the embodiment of whatever truths you believe in in the form of radiant light choose whichever divine being or saint you feel close to if you’re a Buddhist or Buddha if you’re a Christian, feel with all your heart the vivid immediate presence of God, the Holy Spirit, Jesus, or the Virgin Mary.
If you don’t feel linked with any particular spiritual figure, simply imagine a form of pure golden light in the sky before you the important point is visualizing presence that you feel is the embodiment of truth wisdom and compassion and don’t worry if you can’t visualize it very clearly just fill your heart with its presence and trust that it is there Now this is something to memorize so that in time, when the time comes when you’re approaching death, can say this, and I’ll say it for you. So you focus your mind, heart and soul on the presence you have invoked and pray through your blessing, grace and guidance, through the power of reliance that streams from you, may all my negative karma, destructive emotions, obscurations and blockages be purified and removed. May I know myself forgiven for all the harm I have thought and done. May I accomplish this profound practice of Pohwa and die a good and peaceful death and through the triumph of my death may I be able to benefit all other beings living or dead. Now imagine that the presence of light you have invoked is so moved by your sincere and heartfelt prayer that he or she responds with a loving smile and sends out love and compassion in a stream of rays of light from his or her heart.
As these touch and penetrate you and feel what it feels like they cleanse and purify all your negative karma, destructive emotions and obscurations which are the cause of suffering. You see and feel that you are totally immersed in light You are now completely purified and completely healed by the light streaming from the presence. Consider that your very body itself created by karma now dissolves completely into light. This body of light that you are now soars up into the sky and merges inseparably with the blissful presence of light. And you then remain in that state of oneness with the presence for as long as possible, for a couple of minutes.
Okay. Now bring your consciousness back into your body, into the room, and then open your eyes when you’re ready. Through this practice, what you’re actually doing is investing your mind in the wisdom mind of the Buddha or the enlightened being, which is the same as surrendering your soul into the nature of God. Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche says, this is like casting a pebble into a lake. Think of it plummeting down into the water deeper and deeper.
Imagine that through the blessing your mind is transformed into the wisdom mind of this enlightened presence. That in a sense it’s actually like practicing being enlightened simply like practicing being enlightened which is actually what we have the ability to be it is in our nature to be like that it’s just that it’s been covered over with layers and layers of obscurations. Sogyal Rinpoche gives a simpler version of that, which is beginners before by resting quietly and then you invoke the presence of the embodiment of truth then you imagine your consciousness as a sphere of light at your heart which flashes out from you like a shooting star and flies into the heart of the presence in front of you and then it dissolves and merges with the presence and then he says that the third practice is to simply merge your mind with the wisdom mind of the pure presence and consider my mind and the mind of my enlightened being are one. Now what he talks about is that it’s very important to be conscious of preparing for death that most of us he cites the example of, he says, I remember a student of mine in America who went out riding one day, a horse threw her and her foot got stuck in the stirrup.
She was dragged along the ground, and her mind went blank. She tried desperately to recall some practice, but nothing at all would come. She grew terrified. What was good about the terror was that it made her realise that her practice had to become her second nature this was the lesson she had to learn it is a lesson, in fact, we all have to learn says practice Po’a as intensively as you can until you can be sure that you will react with it to any unforeseen event This will make certain that whenever death comes, you’ll be as ready as you can be. And we can only do the best we can.
He talks about, when helping the dying, and what he says is that you can do this practice even though the person may not know that you’re doing it. And you can talk about it if you think that the person actually would be really interested, or whatever. But what he says to do is to visualize the Buddha as a spiritual being above the head of the dying person, and then imagine rays of light pouring down onto them, purifying their whole being, and then their body dissolving into light and merging with the spiritual presence. And you can actually say that prayer too. Their negative karma be purified and removed, may they be forgiven for all the harm that they have done.
Ideally, it’s best if the person can do that for themselves, but there is something that you can do in the being around people who are dying. He says do this throughout the person’s illness, but especially when they’re breathing their last breath, or as soon as possible after breathing stops, and before the body is touched. So Okay. Anybody want to make any comments about that? Do you think that that is something that could be useful?
Okay, what I’d like you to do is to, if anybody feels too uncomfortable about this after I’ve told you what you’re going to do, you don’t have to do it, but I’d really like you to do it. If you could get into pairs with somebody you don’t know, somebody who you didn’t know before you came here, put it that way. Okay? One thing at a time, and I’ll tell you. No.
Have to be in two. Can Catherine, do want to be with one of your laxity? Peter. Okay. That’s fine.
Have you got have you got? Okay. Has everybody got a pair of Sylvia of you? You can be with Lesang. Oh, haven’t you got a pair?
Richard? Oh, you need to be you need to be with somebody. Lesang, you better be with Jampa. Okay. Okay.
Alright, I want one person to be somebody who’s lying down and dying. This is what we can get away with at the end of a weekend like this. Okay, yeah, you have to lie down. Okay, but you haven’t got your eyes shut? No.
Preferably keep it open, actually. How are you going? Okay, now, your partner to the dying person is to keep their eyes open. Your partner is to touch you in some way, hold a hand or hold a head or touch a foot or something like that. And you are to be there in silence for three minutes to be with this dying person and then you just swap over starting from now I always like to meditate on them.
What sort of meditation? Mindfulness or loving kindness or love and kindness? Mhmm. Okay. Okay.
There’s a particular type of meditation which is called exchange yourself for others and which is a way of role playing. You try to put yourself in the other person’s position and and look at the world out of their eyes, feel their feelings, think their thoughts. How would it be to be them? And then oftentimes we look back, you know, having reversed roles, we look back at ourselves and how do we do we see our former selves? What is it that we that we see?
Then we can express to our former selves what it is that we see, how that we feel, how in a in all the various possible situations. So I think that might be it’s quite a useful meditation. Sometimes it’s quite enlightening. Hopefully, quite enlightening. You guarantee?
So, we’re going to, exchange places with a few different types of people. First with someone that you’re very close to that you have an intimate relationship with. And then, you know, trying to put yourself in their place. You know, the American Indians have a saying, you know, don’t judge a person till you’ve walked a month in their moccasins. So trying how would it be to be that feel their feelings, at the situation out of their eyes?
First with a a someone that you’re intimate with. And then looking back to yourself, and what is it that you what that you see, what do you feel when you see yourself, and then expressing it verbally. I’ll I’ll lead you through this, and then we can exchange with a a just trying to think what would be quite useful someone that you aren’t particularly close to but that you have perhaps a working relationship with that you see once in a while and that particularly have a close relationship with, and putting yourself in their situation, and then again looking back. Then an enemy, and then finally, someone is dying, we’ll put up self in their place. We, as as we did an exercise, we’re there sitting at with them.
And how would it be to be that dying person looking back at yourself? What would you see? So let’s try that. So beginning with just a minute or two just to settle the mind to become centered with mindfulness of breathing. Focusing on the natural in and out of the breath.
Just a gentle, easy outflow of the breath. We’re going to meditate exchanging self with others, beginning with someone that you are close to, have an intimate relationship with, and putting yourself in their place. How would it be to be them thinking their thoughts, feeling their feelings, looking at the world out of their eyes? Trying to put yourself in their place. Experience their world as they experience.
And then look back at your former self. What is it that you see? What is it that you feel? Do feel understood? Do you feel respected?
Valued? Do you feel loved? Cared for? And so express what it is that you feel to your former self, what you see, what you experience when you look back at yourself.