Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. In this session from Buddha House’s Pastoral Care Group, two facilitators—Jen and Judy—offer practical Buddhist guidance for supporting people who are ill or dying. The teaching begins with opening meditation on impermanence, motivation-setting and refuge practice, then moves to the group’s mission: helping people face death from a spiritual perspective through phone calls, home visits, and practices like Medicine Buddha meditation and mantra recitation. Jen explains the “death box” resources—books, prayer wheels, mantras, and blessing objects recommended by Lama Zopa Rinpoche—and outlines two types of preparation: spiritual practices like bodhicitta and the five powers during life, and everyday preparations such as writing a will, appointing power of attorney, and making peace with estranged family. Judy then walks through practical care for the dying person itself, emphasizing the need for a calm, peaceful environment and addressing their emotional, physical and spiritual needs. She covers how to help different populations—practising Buddhists, Christians, and non-believers—with specific techniques like generating compassion and avoiding heavy sedation near death. The session includes discussion of post-death care, the forty-nine-day bardo period, and a guided purification meditation using visualization of light at three chakras.
File metadata (for organising)
File: Christele – Track 15.mp3
UUID: d5a05e3b-145f-4360-b689-ca16930c2fc7
Teacher: Christele
Collection: Death & Rebirth (Christele)
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Words: ~14,125
Hi from the Pastoral Care Group. Jen is going to talk about preparing for death and what you can do before the time of death, to be ready at the time of death. Also, I think you’re going to talk about the pastoral care group and what you’re doing, the mission. And Judy will talk more about how to help people dying and what practices you can do and also all the things that are useful at the time of death. And I thought we’re going to do a short breathing meditation, the same as we did a few times, which is to bring the mind here at Buddha House and then motivation and then the prayers and then Jan can start.
Do you want to have questions during your teachings or after? Do you want it to be formal, informal, or how do you want to run it? I think we have it informal. So questions at any time or at the end? It’s up to you.
I think you mentioned maybe at the end. Well, thought about it at the end because if we have questions in the middle, then the first part might run run a bit too long and then the second part’s going be Oh yeah, you’re right. So I don’t know. Yeah, anyway we see. Oh we do it.
Okay, good. Anyway, just adopt your meditation posture. So make sure that your back is straight but relaxed. You can put your hands on your lap, on your knees, or your thigh, or you can adopt the seven points posture with your right hand on top of your left hand. Slightly close your eyes, just leave a bit of light coming in.
Breathe a few times deep in and out. And every time you breathe out, you let go of all the tension in your body and mind. Breathe out and let go of everything that kept your mind busy today. Whatever has happened has happened. We can’t change anything from the past, so let it go.
Breathe out and let go of all the worrying about the future. We create our future with our actions that we do in the present moment. The best preparation for the future is to be mindful of the present moment. The more we can control this, the more peaceful we will be. Breathe out and let go of all the tension that is still left.
Tension in your body, tension in your mind. Allow yourself to be completely here at Buddha’s, in the meditation hall, on your chair or cushion. Feel that there is no better place to be right now. That every part of your body and mind are happy to be here. And then just breathe.
Breathe and be aware of your body. Your body is sitting. If you notice that your mind is wandering off, bring it back gently to the body. Bring the mind back to the body. And let your mind rest on the movements of your breath.
Every time you breathe out, you let go of more thoughts. When you breathe in, you breathe in, just breathe. Nothing else. No thoughts, no emotions, no opinions. Just breathe.
Your mind becomes more and more empty, and you enjoy the empty, quiet space. Now your mind should be a lot calmer and clearer than it was before you started, allowing you to check your motivation for being here tonight and studying this topic on death and rebirth. So please do that, check your motivation for being here tonight. If you find that your motivation is one concerned with merely the comfort of this life, recognize that to be a negative motivation, the cause of suffering and discard it, and replace it with bodhicitta motivation, determination to reach enlightenment for the sake of all sentient beings. In order to reach enlightenment, we must complete the path to enlightenment, and to do that, we need to study and practice all the teachings on the path.
At this time we are studying the teaching on death and rebirth. Therefore, we are doing this session in order to complete the path to enlightenment, so that we can enlighten all sentient beings. So whatever your motivation is, if it’s to reach alignment or if you’ve got other motivation, let the meaning of what you’ve just thought sink in. And now if you wish, you can join me for the refuge prayer and the full immeasurables. I go for refuge until I’m enlightened and to the Buddha, the Dharma, and the supreme assembly.
By my practice of giving and other perfections, may I become a Buddha to benefit all sentient beings. I go for refuge until I’m enlightened and to the Buddha as a Dharma and a supreme assembly. For my practice of giving and other perfections, may I become a Buddha to benefit all beings. I go for refuge until I’m enlightened and to the Buddha as a Dharma and a supreme assembly. For my practice of giving another perfection, may I become a Buddha to benefit all sentient beings?
May all sentient beings have happiness and the causes of happiness. May all sentient beings be free from suffering and the causes of suffering. May all sentient beings never be separated from the happiness that is free from suffering. May all sentient beings abide in equanimity, free from attachment for friends and hatred for enemies. Let’s be wide awake.
Do it. It’s recording. Oh, okay. Yeah. Judy and I have come to speak to you tonight because we’re both members of the Pastoral Care Group, the Buddha House Pastoral Care Group.
I’m the coordinator and Judy’s second in command or something like that. And we just thought we’d well, Christelle had asked us to come and speak anyway. But to me, the Pastoral Care Group is something along the lines of living the Dharma. We can do lots of practice, prayers, all sorts of things to do with the Dharma, but forming this pastoral care group and going out and actually supporting people when they are either ill or dying or they have psychological problems or whatever the case may be. It’s a case of living the Dharma and to me this is really, really important.
We have to actually, I think it’s a bit of an old saying, we have to practice what we preach. So that’s exactly what the pastoral care group is about. I’d first like to just tell you a little saying, which is something, a quote from the seventh Dalai Lama. What we call living is but a journey on the highway to death. And I’ve got, as a lot of people will know, perhaps not many of this group, but I’ve got a bit of a strange sense of humour.
I like these sorts of quotes and things. I think that’s really lovely. So what we call living is but a journey on the highway to death. Now Lama Zopa Rinpoche said that death is just like taking off an old dress and putting a new one. So they’re all just lovely, lovely quotes of how we change from one part of our life to another.
So the pastoral care group. The main aim of the pastoral care group is to help those in need look at their situation from a spiritual perspective. So even though a lot of our members, we’ve got about nine members on the pastoral care group, all women. So if there are any of you here tonight who would like to offer, especially the males, if you’d like to offer to come our pastoral care group, that would be lovely to have a couple of men, wouldn’t it? A lot of them have some kind of medical background, like nurses or something like that.
But you don’t need to have that medical background. What you actually need to have, which is possibly more important, is the spiritual background, is the Buddhist philosophy, that background. So that when we go out to help people, well I shouldn’t use the word help, I should use the word support because there’s quite a difference. When you say you’re going to help someone, often you get into the situation where you’re not actually actually helping them, if you know what I mean. So we’re supporting people.
So if any of you would like to join our group, please see Judy or I afterwards, because we’d love to have you in the group. So we give people spiritual advice on how to manage their problems. So the support can be as simple as a phone call, or we might do a home visit or a visit to an aged facility or a hospital or wherever the person is. Or we have other, you know, more expansive things like the Dharma resources, which practices would be helpful for people to practice while they’re ill or while they’re dying, mantras, all those sorts of things which I’ll go through after. So what we’re actually helping people to do by telling them what practices or mantras or whatever to say is to help them purify their negative karma so that they will then collect extensive merit.
So when they die, they Now, this is where my humour comes into it. I have seniors’ moments and it’s only because of the colour of my hair that I have been seniors’ moments. Their karma will be sorry? Oh, what I forgot to know. No, it was something I was going to Exhausted.
Exhausted. That’s right. So their karma will be minimized or exhausted by creating this positive merit. Now, as far as the group is concerned, the pastoral care group, we have monthly meetings. The first hour of our meeting is a business meeting because we have to have protocols and all those sorts of things.
It’s a fairly casual sort of a meeting. We don’t actually vote. Well, do. We agree on things, but we don’t have so many yeas and so many nays and all this sort of thing and very extensive minutes and all that. It’s fairly casual, really.
But we have that hours meeting. And then for the next hour and a half, one of our volunteer members of the group actually takes a part of Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s teachings on death and dying. And Lama Zopa Rinpoche has actually made up this educational session or sessions which we are to follow. And the way we’re doing them, we’ll do half a module each meeting. So they take us around about twelve months.
That should be the time frame to go through the whole of his advice for people who are dying or who are ill. When we first started this group, we decided amongst ourselves that maybe it would be a good idea if people sort of went through the whole twelve months educational session before they actually went out to visit someone. I mean, if it’s like Judy and myself have been Dama students for ten years? Oh, five. Five?
Oh, okay. Well, I’m a slow learner I’ve been, as you know. When Buddha House first started in Nelson Street, the nun there was Jampa Tensen. And I would always go to Jampa Tensen’s teachings. And she used to tell the new students, oh, this is Jan.
She’s a slow learner. She’s been attending the same teaching for, I don’t know, how many years. That’s right. That’s when you joined and you remember it. So yes, so now where did I get to?
What was I saying? About twelve months for a PhD. Oh that’s right, twelve months, that’s right. But if you like Judy or I, who’ve sort of had a reasonable exposure to the Buddhist philosophy, and we’re quite happy to go out into the community. And we have I’ve got nursing experience, and Judy has volunteer experience for palliative care, you know, well then we feel quite happy to go out.
But anyone that joins the group, we wouldn’t push them to go out if they didn’t feel happy, you know. And some people might have nursing experience or medical experience but not much spiritual dharma experience and they might feel as though they need to sort of wait a little bit longer to go out. And then some of our group may perhaps never go out to visit anyone because they have other specialities that they can help us with and they don’t really feel as though they actually physically want to go out and visit people. They’re quite happy to ring people up and speak to them on the phone. So that’s actually how it all works.
I didn’t I because because your facilitator didn’t give us much time, I’m going to use an excuse now. I I’ve got it all. I’ve got all this written down, you’ll have to excuse me that I can’t just That’s my foot. I’ll only get it one week or a week ago. That’s right.
So I have to read it off my notes. I’m sorry about that. So yes, so if somebody rings up Buddha House, they actually ring Buddha House, and they just give a brief explanation to one of the volunteers here at Buddha House and then they ring me because I’m the coordinator. They tell me what the person has said and give me that person’s phone number and then I ring that person and have a little chat and just see exactly what it is that they would like. And the phone calls I think are probably a very important part too.
Probably just as important as visiting. And that only just came to mind just a couple of days ago when someone rang up and they would terminally ill. But they couldn’t have a visit, you know, for the first this next week because the client had just had his chemo, so he was feeling really unwell. And then the following week there were lots of, you know, appointments with different doctors and things like that. I’m starting to think that Judy is a bit the same way that the phone calls are very important, aren’t they?
To sort of keep in touch with them. That’s right. Yeah. So we will be phoning people but also visiting. And it is preferable if people who wish to use our services, it is preferable if they have some interest in Buddhism.
We’re quite happy to go out to people that follow the Buddhist path, but it is preferable if they do have an interest in Buddhism because that is our main aim, to help them with their spiritual practice, you know, and to continue that so that when so that they can die peacefully and then hopefully have a better rebirth. But we won’t turn anyone away if they didn’t follow the Buddhist philosophy. As well as the education part that Lama Zopa Rinpoche has organised, he also recommends that all FPMT centres have what he calls death box. Now this death box actually consists of two books that he has written. There’s Heart Practices for Death and Dying and Heart advice for death and dying.
And the education that we do with the pastoral care group actually comes out of these books. So the meditation practices come out of the practices book and the heart advice is the education part of it. So this is what he calls the death box. So we’ve got his two publications. Can I just say, also included in the death box, part of it is an MP3 player at the back, which is about eight hours of audio, and with Sangye Khadro, who wrote the book How to Meditate?
And she and also you can print off different meditation practices, and she goes through all the different stages, which is really good. No, no, that’s good. Then there is the prayer card, which has quite a few mantras on it and the different deities and his holiness, the fourteenth Dalai Lama. And on the back, he has a little I’ll actually read this out to you. You can pass it around afterwards, but I will read this out to you.
This, he suggests, is placed on the body of the person when they’ve died, or if they wish to hold it when they’re ill, with the mantras facing the body or on the head or wherever. Also it can be placed under someone’s pillow if they’re ill. But he’s written this on the back. My most dear, kindest brother and sister, please look at these mantras quite often, especially look at these mantras when you are leaving from this old body. Dear one, please don’t cling to anything and let yourself become completely free.
In this most important moment of life, you don’t need to be afraid at all of being born in the lower realms and so forth. I give all my merits of the past, present, and future to you to have a happy journey and a happy, wonderful, sun shining future. I give my big love to you. All the Buddhas and the Bodhisattvas love you, and you are in their care. May anyone who sees these mantras be immediately reborn in the pure land, where one can become enlightened or receive a perfect human body by quickly actualising the causal vehicle, the three principles of the path, and the result vehicle, the secret mantra Vajrayāna, based on correctly devoting and only pleasing one’s own holy Guru.
You can also pray in this way, may I take rebirth in whatever place is most beneficial for sentient beings no matter where it is. To think this thought again and again is extremely good. The other choice is to think. May I be born in Amitābha’s blissful field to quickly benefit all sentient beings. Thank you.
With much love and prayers, Lama Zopa. So it’s really quite lovely. So that’s for people who are ill or who have died. Also in the death box is supposed to be a stupa, which we have one, the large stupa, but it’s a little, a tiny stupa, which is which is the omniscient mind of the Buddha. But instead of a stupa in our death box, we actually have a little prayer wheel, which is also from Rinpoche.
And in this prayer wheel is nearly two million, it’s one million eight hundred and something or rather, tiny little Om Mani Padme Hum mantras, which have been written by His Holiness the Dalai Lama. And they’re in such tiny writing, in his handwriting, such tiny writing, they need to be viewed through magnifying glass. And so Lama Zopa has said here to place this on the person’s head when they’ve died, and especially on the crown of the head where the consciousness is supposed to exit. That’s the word. Thank you, Kerry.
To exit. That’s right. Yeah. So you you can have a look at those after. There’s also a blessing string which well, guess this is a blessing string, but I’m not quite sure whether the blessing strings are sort of single blessing strings for the person who’s died.
We haven’t got one. And the other thing is the Kālacakra sand, which is, I think someone might be able to tell me if I’m wrong, that it is sand that’s that has been blessed by his holiness to sprinkle on the body. I I read that somewhere, so I think that is correct. So that’s the death box, which we actually have as part of our pastoral care group. So if there are any of you in this group that someone you know is ill or is dying, we can actually, for a small donation, can give you one of these prayer cards.
And I’m not quite sure whether these other books, these two books of Lama Zopa’s are in the library. F f p m t dot com has got they’ve got an online shop over there, so you can get all of that. Yeah. And they’re pretty quick to arrive. Usually, it’s just, yeah, one or two So there are two preparations for death.
Well, this is what I’ve decided. We must sorry, I can’t help it. Well, this is what I’ve written in my notes, that we actually must prepare for death during life. Being on your deathbed and then suddenly thinking, oh my goodness, you know, now what were those mantras or what was that practice I was supposed to do?’ or ‘Goodness me, I wish I’d forgiven somebody for being nasty to them or I wish I’d told somebody I loved them or whatever. Actually have to prepare for death during our life.
So in that preparation there is actually a spiritual preparation and then what I’ve called an everyday preparation which is things like organising your funeral etc etc. So with the spiritual preparation, His Holiness says that if we aren’t good at meditating during our life, how can we be any good at meditating as we’re dying? Because we would have no sense of concentration. We wouldn’t be able to hold our concentration to actually meditate. So we need to do all these things while we’re alive.
And we actually need to do them now. And when I first started learning the Dharma at the old Buddha house, one of the nuns there was teaching one day and she really sort of laid in on the line. She said, you know, you must start your practice now. And that really moved me because, yeah, because it’s no good procrastinating and putting off because we could walk out of here tonight and get run over by a I was going to say a train. Get run over by a car or something.
So we really do have to practice now. So there’s a little another one of my little sayings that I picked up. Master, how do I prepare for death? Learn to live. How do I prepare how do I so how shall I learn to to live?
Prepare yourself for death. So life and death are one one and the same you might say. Yeah. So the two things that we must do in preparation for death, preparation for death, the things we must do during life, is we must practice bodhicitta, which is the good heart, compassion for all sentient beings without exception. And that’s another very important thing I think I’ve learned is that it’s for all sentient beings without exception.
That includes everybody. That includes people you don’t like and the people you don’t think should be cared for, etc, etc. If we practice compassion for all sentient beings, then accumulate merit and then we diminish our negative karma. So all looking good for when we die. We also should practice the five powers.
Now, have you been through the five powers? Oh, you haven’t? Okay. This is just a very brief thing on the five powers. The first power is the power of the positive seed, and that is the accumulation of merit through offering different things while you’re still alive and letting go of those things.
So they say that we should, you know, when we become ill, preferably before, we should give away a lot of our very precious possessions. And that doesn’t mean giving away things you don’t really want. It means giving away those that are really precious to you. So that stops that clinging. That stops that clinging sort of a thing.
And that’s how we get ourselves into so many problems because we do cling to things. The second power is the power of aspiring prayer, and that is that we wish that we will always have a connection with the dharma, whatever life we go into after this one, that we will always have a connection with the dharma. The third one is the power of repudiation, and that is to actually build up this aversion to suffering and grasping. So we need to build up an aversion to that. But then we also need to have virtuous thoughts so that when we actually die, we have positive thoughts.
And this will then propel us to a higher rebirth. The fourth power is the power of determination, which is to have that positive state of mind. And also, in having that positive state of mind that we will then think to ourselves, well, you know, we’d all like to go to a higher rebirth. But the most precious thing to do is to think that may we go to a rebirth where we are of the most benefit to other sentient beings, even if it means going to a lower rebirth. And I mean, that’s right.
That would be pretty difficult, wouldn’t it? The fifth one is the fifth power is the power of familiarity. And I only read this one through very briefly, the familiarity is the familiarity with the position that the Buddha died. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen photos or statues of the Buddha at death lying on his right side with his right palm under his cheek and his left hand down by the side of his body. And they say that the power of familiarity is to familiarise yourself with that position.
So you’re lying on your right side with your right palm under your cheek, and that your head should be facing north. Now I don’t know why that is, but your head should be facing north. And if it isn’t facing north, to imagine that it’s facing north. To block right nostril with the little finger of this right hand. Do you know, Crystal, why that is to block the right nostril?
For the consciousness to get out the right way, but it’s something like that. Yeah. Was it channel? Or Yeah. I think it is something.
It’s you know? No. Alright. Does anyone know? I might have it here, actually.
Hold on. Is it I couldn’t find it in my notes. It just said that that’s Locking your right nostril with your little finger. Oh, this is such stop the energy of desire and attachment, which can become hindrance at a time of death. Oh, no, that is something they do say.
That’s right. You should go off to sleep in that position. That’s exactly right. Yeah. And also I’ve got here the power of familiarity is familiarise yourself with positive thoughts and behaviour and intention and attitude.
And also the familiarity was to practice Tonglen. Yeah. Giving and taking. Yeah. The last meditation we did last week.
You you’re you’ve all been through that. Right? Very good. What was the second power? The power of aspiring prayer.
We’ve actually I don’t oh, you oh, well, you’ve obviously got it anyway. Do it. No. No. No.
I didn’t know whether anyone wanted a handout because I was thinking if they wanted a handout, we could do some from FPMT material. I mean, we No. If I can we photocopy some of these things or not? Yeah. No.
We could. I’ll just yep. No. We could. What’s the?
Sorry? The power of Power of determination. Yeah. It cause any other name, but it’s the same thing? The ones I got the notes from were from Jampa Tensen’s, so it could well be a little bit a little bit different.
I don’t know. I’m not sure. It’s for me. But the same thing anyway. Same thing.
That’s my everyday. Oh, here we are. Now, I’ve called the everyday preparations for death, and to me, this is to be compassionate to our loved ones and our families because while we’re still alive, we should let them know exactly what sort of funeral we want and all the different bits and pieces. If we’re Buddhist, what specific practices, etc, who to contact, all those sorts of things. That’s what the everyday preparation for death is.
The funeral, if want to write it down, that’s fine. But I think that we really should let our family know. We really should sit down with them and tell them exactly what we want because I know through nursing that there are lots of people whose families don’t know what sort of funeral nobody in the family knows what sort of funeral their loved one wants. And then when that person dies, there can be a great deal of conflict between family members trying to organise funerals. One person will say, oh, I’m sure dad wanted this and no, no, no, he would have wanted that.’ And, you know, and it’s just yeah.
If you can write it down, have everything specifically written down, but but also tell your family, at least tell one of them what you actually want. The other thing is to make a will, because the very same thing, when people die and die intestate, they have no will, then there’s all sorts of problems. And these are problems that you are inadvertently causing your loved ones. Bequests, you know, if you want to leave any money to specific charities. Charities, that’s right.
Yes. The other thing is too, whether you wish to become an organ donor. Even being Buddhist, I have read that you can become an organ donor, but then it means that the body in Buddhist being Buddhist, the body is supposed to be left two days without being touched. So if you want to be an organ donor, then that makes it a bit difficult. But I think it was His Holiness that said it was the motivation that really, you know, if you really wish to be an organ donor and to be of benefit to it could be six or eight different people, and that’s your motivation, then that’s fine.
Also, you know, appointing a power of attorney and all those sorts of things. And the other one was the Guardianship. Yeah. But the other one where you write down, I do not wish to be resuscitated. Advance directives, that’s the one.
The advance directives, that’s a very important one. Mum died two years ago, but my dad him and my mum both had advance directives. I know how important it was with her, and I know how important it is with dad too. And you don’t have to be elderly for something like that. But if you have it written down and just make sure that you do have copies that you give to various people so that everybody knows.
And the other couple of things, as I said before, discuss all this with your family, what you’ve actually written down or what you want done. Also, to ensure that you have a peaceful death, to perhaps contact estranged family members or friends or people that you’ve had disagreements disagreements with and to make peace with them. Because then you’ve made that peace and then when you’re dying you’re not likely to be lying there thinking oh my goodness, I wish I’d said to whoever, I’m really sorry for what I said or what I did or whatever. So that’s a very, very important thing, but a very difficult thing to do. And somewhere, where did I read that?
There’s a meditation you can do if you don’t wish to actually go face to face with someone and tell them that you’re sorry. It was Judy Appanna, Lynne, that death and dying. Living in like, death? Living with that’s right, I think it was. Facing Death and Finding Hope.
Yeah. This lady who gave this weekend on like a death and dying weekend, and in her little booklet there was a meditation there, how you could actually meditate and you could actually make peace with people, you know, if you would if it made it easier, I guess, than actually going face to face with them. I think Sogyal Rinpoche also gives some techniques to do that. It’s not administration, but Sogyal Rinpoche. Oh, Sogyal Rinpoche?
Oh, could Yes. I can touch on that a bit in here too. Do you? Oh, good. Oh, good.
Yeah. Yep. So there’s lots of practices that you can actually do to benefit the dead or people who are dying. The Medicine Buddha Pooja, which is the wish fulfilling jewel, which is the one you did just before, didn’t you? Yeah.
Is a very, very auspicious one, is a very important one to do after someone has died, or the Medicine Buddha Sadhana, which is a shorter version, which I’m not sure if we have it here. Sapphire? Do you know? Do we have the shortened just the sedan or the shortened version? We only have the No.
Oh, okay. Phowa, P H O W A, or I think it’s P O W A. It depends on which one you Yeah. Which one you look at. POA or POA, sorry.
I barrack for Phowa. That’s why I probably say power instead of POA. Sorry. Phowa is a practice which can be done and the consciousness actually leaves through the Brahma opening at the top of the head. And that actually sends the consciousness to a pure land.
So that’s a very special practice. And you’ll have to either look these up on the website or go to the library or whatever. Chenrezig, a practice of compassion, that’s another one we can do for people who are dying or who have died. Phowa can only be done for someone who has died because it’s the consciousness actually leaving the body. Then Lama Zopa Rinpoche says that if you don’t know any other practice at all, if you do Śākyamūni Buddha meditation, that is fine.
And I mean, all these things that are recommended, at the time, I just think that at the time it’s what feels right for If it’s someone that you’re close to or someone that’s died and you’re there and they’re not actually Buddhist, you can just very quietly or just think these mantras or practices rather than say them out loud. Because people need to die peacefully, not upset them. Mantras, the main one is Om Mani Padme Hum, which is the Chenrezig compassion mantra. And you can also do offerings. You can do light offerings like the little candles what are they called?
The little lights. Tea lights! The little tea lights! And dedicate them to that person. You can actually make offerings to Sangha and dedicate and on behalf of that person who’s died.
All sorts of things you can do. And one thing that I did read, which was really interesting, you can actually have a retreat. You can do a retreat on that person who’s died on their main deity practice. So that’s to me that’s really interesting. You knew that Sapphire?
Yeah, that’s lovely isn’t it? I think that’s really that’s really lovely. It comes across all there are other in Christianity too, there’s that same thing in the Catholic tradition too. There’s all kinds of traditions that would do that, like, for somebody who’s you do a retreat on their saint on this Yeah. Or the Buddhist tradition is.
It’s really lovely, isn’t it? Practice. Yeah. Because that actually sends a lot of merit to that person that’s just died and can and can actually sort of diminish a lot of their negative karma. So it’s really important.
And then there are prayers such as the refuge prayer and the four immeasurables. You can recite the Heart Sūtra or the King of Prayers, which is a really, really long I can’t remember how many pages it is, but it’s quite a long one. But there is one that the pastoral care group have been given, it’s called the Bardo prayer. And that’s very short, isn’t it? Yeah.
There are several little sections there where you insert the person’s name. But all these prayers, etc, are to be done forty nine days after the person has died because that’s then when that’s when it’s said that the consciousness has actually taken a new body in within forty nine days. So you only do the prayer for forty nine days, the prayers etc, for forty nine days after they’ve died. And that brings me to that board. That board, if you have anyone that’s died or is ill and you wish to write it on that board when we have practices like Medicine Buddha or I think Medicine Buddha is the main one those names are actually read out.
If it’s somebody that’s died, could you please put the date of when they died so that then the office staff can work out when the forty nine days are up. If it’s somebody that’s ill, just put their name down there. And what’s also really good is for the rest of us that come here to see the day I noticed somebody had started putting the days there. Yeah. Yeah.
Just for going, oh my god. This makes it more real. People don’t Oh, on Wednesday. Oh, okay. Yeah.
Lovely. Yeah. Yeah. I’ve I’ve told you enough. I think I’ll hand over to Judy.
Now don’t be like me and hit it because it doesn’t like I’ll try not to. So I’m actually going to talk about how to care for the dying person. Jan said a little bit about what I was going to say, so I’ll try not to be too repetitive. So first of all I’d just like to start by saying something that Lama Zopa Rinpoche says: When attending to a dying person, we must have a good heart, be mindful of impermanence, loving kindness, compassion and the four noble truths. Recite and dedicate for the person while they are dying and after.
Inspire spaciousness of mind and keep the atmosphere quiet and peaceful. Dedicate all the positive energy that they will have a positive rebirth. And so it’s very important to, when the person’s dying, to set a very peaceful environment. And Lama Zopa Rinpoche says once again, Make the place as peaceful as possible. A calm, peaceful, serene, holy environment is so important.
There should be beautiful views, beautiful art, flowers, images of deities and holy beings. The point is to make a positive imprint on the person’s mind. The person’s mind is elevated and they’re not afraid of dying. So when we’re helping the dying, we have to take into consideration different needs. For example, their physical needs.
Because when they’re sick and they’re lying in bed, they’ve lost all their independence, they’ve lost the ability for their body to move or just to perform any sort of daily functions to bathe themselves, they might need help to eat, so therefore all sorts of emotions will arise in their head, in their mind I should say. Also, so we also have to be very aware of their emotional needs and we have to treat them with respect, patience and kindness. We have to put aside our own needs and do whatever we can to help them. If it’s somebody close to us that’s dying, often we’re surprised about the emotions that come up in our own mind. So we have to really know how to deal with our own emotions.
Emotions of fear, regret and attachment. So therefore we have to be very mindful. To help somebody else die with a positive, happy, peaceful mind, we have to also have a very happy, positive, peaceful mind. And to do this, we can meditate on mindfulness, impermanence, realising that everything is changing, our bodies, the person that’s dying’s body, and our attachment. We have to learn to let go.
So we have to be able to do this to have a clear positive mind ourselves so we can sit calmly with the person and listen to them because they want to talk or they may want us to talk to them or they may just want to sit silently with us. So we had to be with them fully and offer words to calm their mind. We had to put aside our own needs and do whatever we can to help them. We also had to give them permission to die. Reinforce that you’re okay, the rest of the family’s okay, all their property, their possessions, it’s all going be taken care of, there’s nothing to worry about.
So then we also have to worry about their concerns about their spiritual needs, so that they can make sense of their life and their death and their suffering and give them hope for life beyond death. Sogyal Rinpoche says in the Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, there are two very important things for the dying person. They’re giving hope and finding forgiveness. Often when a person’s dying, a lot of different emotions like regret, depression come up in their mind and that gives them a very great sense of hopelessness. So if a person has done some unskilled actions in their life, let them talk about it.
Let them express their feeling and listen to their story without being judgmental. This gives them hope. Encourage them if they’ve hurt somebody to talk to that person and offer them forgiveness, or if people have harmed them, to forgive them. Or otherwise they can just, as well, just vow from this moment on they won’t perform any more unskilled actions. And then, if they have done some unskilled actions, encourage them to think about the virtuous things they’ve done in their life, what they’ve achieved, validate their life.
And explain to them if they are a Buddhist, talk about Buddha nature. The mind is pure and good. And if they’re not a Buddhist, you can say that naturally our minds are pure and good. Explain also that these negative actions are transitory. They can be cleared away.
And we can do, if they’re open to it, a purification practice with them. If they’re religious, remind them that God will forgive and is full of unconditional love. And tell them they can pray to Buddha to ask for forgiveness or pray to God to give them peace of mind. And then I just wanted to talk about how we can spiritually help different people, how we can help the dying Buddhist, the dying Christian person and the dying non believer. First of all, if it’s a Buddhist person like in our pastoral care group, we’ll find out how much they know about Buddhism, if they do a deity practice or if they’re familiar with any meditations.
And if they do have a deity, make sure that deity, either a statue or a picture, is close by where they can see them to remind them of that deity so they can do their practice. If they don’t know any practices and they’re well enough, you can teach them some practices. Otherwise if they’re too sick, you can do the practice for them, either in their presence or at home in your daily practice, you can dedicate for them, or here at Buddha House, like with the Medicine Buddha tonight, we can dedicate it to anybody. And when the person’s dying as well, it’s very important not only just to dedicate for the dying person, but also to dedicate for the carer who is suffering just as much. But to be able to do any of these things, we once again, I just have to reiterate, we have to have our own minds must be peaceful and positive.
Therefore that’s why we have to practice daily. And while we’re practicing daily, we’re preparing for our own deaths. We’re preparing our mind for our own deaths. We have to have the ability to be present with their suffering and to realise that you can’t fix anything, can’t change anything. We can control our minds, but we can’t control the minds of others.
So don’t blame yourself. If a family member is disturbed or weeping or is encouraged that they distance from the person that’s dying, because this may disturb their consciousness. And it may also prevent them from letting go. Lama Zopa recommends that medication should not be given to heavily sedate the dying person, as the negative karma may not be able to find its way out. And then if you’re dealing with a dying person from a Christian faith, you have respect for their beliefs and their practices.
And you can talk to them about faith and trust, praying to God, God is loving, forgiveness and compassion. You can still do meditations with them, but instead of imagining the Medicine Buddha above their head melting into light, purifying their body, you can talk about God melting into them, filling their body with peace and calm. And then if you’re talking to somebody that’s a non believer, you can have more of talk to them in the language of psychology, more or less have just a general chat to them and make them be aware not to be caught up in anger, attachment and fear, but to have a calm positive mind without regrets. Have more of a discussion. And if they know that you’re from a Buddhist background and they want to about it, you can talk to them about it, but only if they ask.
And they might ask you, do you believe in rebirth?’ and say, well, I’m not sure, what do you think?’ And let them talk. And also make sure that they don’t have anybody they’d like to make peace with before they die. And once again, if you’re sitting with them and they’re sleeping, you can do your practices. You can do Medicine Buddha practice, Medicine Buddha mantra, you can do Tonglen for them while you’re sitting there, you can imagine you’re breathing in all their negative karma, breathing it in in form of black smoke which goes to your heart, purifying any of your negative karma, and breathing out white light so that their bodies and their minds are peaceful and calm. So Jan’s already mentioned some of the practices you can do at the time of death.
Yes, Medicine Buddha and King of Prayers Heart Sūtra. And we keep on doing these practices, not just while the person’s dying, but for hours or even days after death, up to forty nine days. It says that according to Buddhist tradition, that the person actually dies when consciousness leaves the body, and this is said to be after the eighth stage of death. And so this can be apparent by seeing fluid leaving the nostrils and if the body stays fresh and there’s no odour, then the consciousness is still present and if there’s still heat around the heart chakra, the consciousness is still present. It’s best to leave the body as undisturbed for as long as possible.
So if a person is dying in a hospital, maybe if they are a Buddhist, it’s a good idea to talk to the hospital administration and perhaps see if the body can be put into another room and left undisturbed. You also have to take into consideration the attitudes and beliefs of other family members. If somebody dies at home, of course there’s a bit more flexibility and you can leave the body undisturbed until you call in undertakers or medical people. So it’s important not to touch the body until the consciousness is gone, because if we touch the body, the consciousness may exit from that part. So it’s said that if the consciousness leaves from a lower part of the body, it can result in a rebirth in a lower realm.
So we’re encouraged to tug the hair on the crown, or if they’re bald, tap the head for the consciousness to leave from that spot. And we can also put the holy objects like little prayer wheel if they’re lying on the pillow, put the prayer wheel on the pillow that’s touching this part of the head. We can put the mantras on the chest. We can also photocopy mantras and put them on the chest. And those mantras can be left on the chest, so that when the undertaker takes them away, they’re still left there, they can be left on the chest in the coffin for the burial or the cremation.
Lama Zopa says that Medicine Buddha is very powerful if recited after death. And there’s some very powerful mantras that can be said when somebody is dying as well. Also, after breathing has stopped, as we said, in Buddhist terms we don’t really say they’ve died until the consciousness leaves the body, so we have to be very careful that there’s no discussion by family members talking about wills, property, funerals, that may disturb the consciousness so it doesn’t leave the body, or if once again if a person is weeping or upset, to sort of distance them a bit from the person that’s just stopped breathing. Lama Zopa says: it makes the process of separation easier for the dying person if can achieve a peaceful environment with the sounds of prayers and mantras being recited. So then there’s the practices, as Jan has gone through, helping after death, that we can do up to forty nine days, the Bardo prayer.
But we can also request for prayers to be said by His Holiness the Dalai Lama, and that in turn goes around to all the FPMT centres where monks and nuns will also say prayers. If the person is not a FPMT student, we can still put up their name and make a donation for this to happen. It’s also said to be very powerful if donations can be made from the person that’s died from their estate. Say for example, to put a hospice or a church or Daw House Hospice Foundation or Mary Potter. And it’s also said that if they’ve already had a rebirth in a lower realm, if a donation is made on their behalf, it can uplift them to a higher realm.
And if it if it isn’t possible that money can be taken out of their estate, we can make a donation in their name on their behalf. There is lots of recommended reading that’s available in the library, and there’s also a section in the library on deaf and dying. And I’ve found that this by Christine Longaker is an excellent book. Christine Longaker lost her husband about twenty years ago when he was in his twenties. And since then she’s been involved in hospices in America, particularly in California, and works with Sogyal Rinpoche.
And she talks about practices here for the Buddhist, for the Christian people, and also practices and advice for not only the dying person, but relatives, and I just think it covers everything and it’s very easy to read. Facing Death and Finding Hope. I think it covers everything. I’m a volunteer in palliative care with Southern Adelaide Palliative Services that works out of Daw House, the hospice. I’m actually a volunteer in the community.
So that means that volunteers in the community do social support. We can have a client and we go out and sit with that client once a week up to four hours. So we have extensive training and we’re taught to listen, just to let that person express everything and talk about their life. A lot of the family have heard all their story and it’s amazing what they start talking about or you can see a photograph and ask them question and they’ll just talk and talk. Found that by my Buddhist practice it’s really helped in my voluntary work because a lot of people will say don’t you get attached?’ and I say no, I don’t get attached’ you certainly make a bond with that person but by doing my practices on mindfulness and impermanence and attachment then I know that this person is dying and I know that for that four hours that I’m there, while their carer goes out and has a break, if I can just make their life that much better then it’s such that wonderful joyous effort feeling that you can’t describe.
So, and I also know that this year both my parents died and Buddhism helped me greatly with that. And the compassion that I’m mindful of even in my voluntary work with my parents came back to me tenfold. I was just blown away by the by the amount of compassion that was out there. So just to finish off, I’d just like to say that in Buddhist teachings, it said if we can help another person die with a peaceful, happy, positive state of mind, it’s one of the greatest acts of human kindness that we can do. But to be able to do this, we have to have a happy, peaceful, positive state of mind to help that person have a fortunate rebirth in the next life.
But also, it helps us to train our own mind for our own death. Okay, so that’s on. So any questions? Yeah. Sapphire.
Have you I think you had much experience working with kids who were dying? No. No. I haven’t either. No.
I’m just I’m just curious about because I’ve been asked I’ve been thinking a lot about just questions about when it you know, about asking about what age was And then I’m, like, seven years old, I can talk to him about that. Actually, he was asking me about the death process, so I went through that with him. But, I mean, when he got out of it, I don’t know. But no. It depends.
It’s difficult. Yeah. Mhmm. Because it’s very scary for them. I mean, it’s scary for us.
But it’s only scary because best scary, don’t they? That’s right. Yeah. Yeah. Probably it’s better the younger, the better.
Isn’t it really? Yeah. So how many people would bring into Buddha House and ask for your help or the group’s help? Is there a big demand for Well, actually, we’ve had quite a few. I’m just trying to think of I’ve got them all written down in the book.
There’s probably about a dozen so far but they’ve been of varying sort of some people have been emotionally unwell or psychologically unwell And then some people have actually been dying or are dying. We’ve had people ringing about their pets dying. And that’s another thing that I didn’t actually think to mention before was when pets are dying. And I’ve only had experience through my cat who was about eighteen years old. I think he actually was a Buddha.
He was just so beautiful. And he used to sit there when I’d meditate. And so when he was dying, I’d, you know, I’d make sure that he was sitting there near me and I’d whisper mantras in his ears. And that’s what I would do if I had a pectine. You know, I used to do that.
So we’ve had people ringing about that. And even to something a little bit different, one student who was doing Certificate IV in Aged Care and one of the questions in describe how you would care for two different patience from different religious backgrounds. And she’d chosen the Buddhist patient as one. I don’t know what her other one was. And she rang up to sort of ask.
And that’s a very sort of similar thing too, as if she were asking how to care for a friend of hers who was Buddhist who was dying. Yay. But I failed to mention that the pastoral care group, it’s only been called the pastoral care group for the last how long? Four months? A few months?
Few Yeah, perhaps six at the most. Before that it was the death and dying group. That’s That’s much nicer. Well that was Young’s idea to change it from Oh, well, that’s that’s a good question too. Because when we when we first started the Deaf and Dying group, was probably about three years ago, reckon it was it was a fair while ago, we we kind of got into this sort of a, oh, I don’t know, this circular sort of a thing where we were where we were going to we were going to or wish to, to support people who were dying.
But as we were trying to organize this group, we had to have so many protocols and and we and we sort of got into this terrible situation where we wanted to have everything in place before we actually started this group. So all we were doing for that whole couple of years was to be putting in place all these protocols and now if this situation arises, what will we do with that? But we never ever had anyone ring up to ask for our support. Not that they knew that we were a group, but the absolutely amazing thing was that when Heather Conti started that group, she went away. Lyndee Abraham took over the education part of house and then I by default because I’d attended all the meetings I became the coordinator and then Jungyang came upon the scene and we suddenly said one day, you know we’re just going round and round in circles and we’re not helping anyone.
So I think it was her that actually brought up the name wasn’t it? Pastoral care, because in Christian religions, the ministers, etcetera, they’ll all be they always practise pastoral care. So we decided to call it the pastoral care and that we would support people who were ill or whatever. And it was just so amazing. It was probably only a few weeks after we changed the name that all these people started ringing up Buddha House and asking, you know, could we could we be of assistance to them?
It was just just amazing. Prior to the death and dying group, Natalie Cagan, who’s also a member of our group, she’s been associated with the Buddha House for years and she said as long as she can remember there’s always been a group that’s sort of been interested in that sort of thing but it’s never ever got anywhere. And I must admit that a lot of the enthusiasm, etc, is due to Jung Young’s influence because she was just so enthusiastic and so positive. You know, I like you start small, you you grow and grow, and you just don’t know what what you could end up with. But, yeah, we’ve just had all these people.
So it’s just just amazing. So we’ve obviously done the we’ve sown the seeds there, you know, for for people to and of course then we’ve written a few articles to put in the newsletter and things like that. So how how does the community know that there’s a service like this from Buddha House? Is there any communication with the community or is it just word-of-mouth? Well it would be word-of-mouth plus in the newsletter and in those little news updates.
There was supposed to be one going out just recently, I don’t know if it has or not, in the emails, you know, in the updates, in the email system. But I guess we’re probably quite happy we don’t become absolutely inundated because we need to get ourselves a little bit sort of organised. Well we are fairly organised. We’re organised, yeah. And so we’re coping with the number referrals that we’re getting and as Jan said, each month with our meetings we do some training and everybody’s taking in turns so we can empower ourselves and so we’re hoping that we grow with the demand.
When does the caring stop? As in when you work with with people or work with somebody who’s dying, when does when do when do you finish offering what you offer as an individual or as part of this pastoral care care group. When does that closure happen? Can only Where is it? Does it remain open?
Well I’ll tell you my experiences with district nursing and that was that you would do several visits to the family after the person had died. What would yours be similar? We can have one or two visits, but then they can also go on to have some grief volunteers from the grief part of it too. Oh, okay. But we can do one or two more visits so it’s not completely breaking ties with that family.
And that’s a very important thing too, and especially not so much after a person’s died. Because you often hear when someone’s died, everyone comes from everywhere. You know, all the friends and everything and people cook cook meals and they do all sorts of things. And then probably six or eight weeks down the track when all those people who were so helpful before have gone back to work or gone back to their families. And, you know, the the the bereaved person is actually is actually left high and dry.
It’s not that people mean to be that way, but it’s just the way it is. So that’s an interesting thing, actually, isn’t it? Because, yeah, we will have to look into that too, I guess. You know? That’s Yeah.
And especially where there are children concerned too, where a child has has died or, you know, a sibling has died. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, when you hear instances of That’s an interesting one, isn’t it? Mhmm.
Depends on their state of mind at the time that they know how they’re going. Yeah. Well, that’s right. I suppose if they died in in in agony or in severe pain or something. Because that I’m making it up.
Was my grandmother died twenty years from now, She died in her sleep, it could have been. Yeah. Actually, we could ask we’re actually asking Geshe-la. To come to our next meeting on the fourteenth of November. So would you like us to actually ask that question?
And you’re always in this group, aren’t you? Like, you continue on with all the modules. Mhmm. But you’ll continue on with the rest of the modules. Coming for the weekend.
Actually, I will tell you after regarding the weekend, but he’ll be teaching also. Let’s see. Anybody remember the date? No. Thank you.
What after the meditation weekend? Yes. Yeah. It’s going to be one day, actually, but he he would be teaching. So, yeah, so it’s also a possibility to ask him at this time.
Yeah. Because that’s that’s interesting, isn’t it? Never thought of that, but that’s right. Unless this came to mind when when we were talking about all this. At least they wouldn’t be touched or there would be no noises or no disturbances.
Or Is the problem actually touching, or is the problem moving? I’m not too sure. Touching? No. It’s actually Touching.
So how do you feel the heat? Yeah. If you still want to check if there’s heat, you’ve got it in touch. That’s another question for That’s right. We’ll have lots of questions for Geshe-la.
That’s right. I thought it was to do with what Judy was saying before was that if you touch the body and the consciousness hasn’t left, that it may Leave from that spot. From that spot. And if it’s on the lower part of the body, then it it may be that it would lead to a lower rebirth. I don’t know, actually, could you tell them what you said that Jampa Tensen said?
That us mere mortals Oh yes, that us mere mortals, our consciousness goes zaps straight away. It’s just these great lamas who can keep their body fresh for days and they can choose a very good rebirth. But for us it’s almost instantaneous. Might not be such an issue, actually, unless we become great lamas. And they do say that some of lamas, when they actually do die, they may be they may be sitting or they may be in the meditation posture, and they can be there for days.
Yeah. And the body is is quite upright. It’s absolutely amazing. So if a normal person dies. What’s normal?
Like, just your average job. Just your average job life. Yeah. Can technically then touch and move them sort of straight away. We don’t have to wait several days.
Just go for the head. Oh, sorry. You mean someone who’s not Buddhist? No, just anybody. Life is not going to be the Dharma.
So someone who’s not a lama or just us mere mortals. Oh, but we don’t know that, do we? No, see, that’s the only We don’t really know. There could be a Buddha amongst us here or we don’t know, do we? There’s actually be Buddhas and all of us We don’t know it.
So if we need to touch it, we just Touch them. Yeah. And put this two power and everything. Yeah. And put on it.
Yeah. Yeah. Pop it fully. So have you had opposition or whatever it is with doctors or the staff medical models of someone if they’ve died and the family saying please don’t disturb them? I can’t imagine a hospital allowing you just to wheel grandma into the next room and leave her there for a few days.
Well, you can just do what you can do, I You just do the best you can as long as your motivation’s there for that person. In Yeah. Have you worked in hospitals? Yeah. Have you ever come to hospitals?
Have you have you ever had a situation? I think just a couple that I remembered was we weren’t able to leave them very long for, you know, eight to twelve hours. But you still you can have eight to twelve hours. Yeah. At least.
But, also, people that are really practice often try and get home. And then they’ll stay there for, like, a couple of days. Well, then the family can decide. Oh, yeah. They’re they’re able to stay in the home for however long.
And we would just have to get with the temperature. But I I know but I think you have to actually notify their death within The death still has been registered and Forty eight hours or something. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn’t mean that the body has to.
No. No. No. That’s right. But the doctor would come touch them.
No worries. Well No. The doctor doesn’t always come and touch. Oh, so they know that they can. Yeah.
Well, that’s right. They know they do. Certified by a doctor that knows them. Right. You can’t just have a stranger coming at at home.
And so, yeah, the doctor knows that they practice and is respectful. But often it’s the GP at home that needs to come and qualify. And, you know, you often got a relationship or you can have take opportunities to talk to the GP, you know, about the the time of certification. I have a Maori And when you think of it sort of many years back, like, when when my parents were young, you know, they their grandparents and parents all used to die at home. Mhmm.
And they you know, it was we? Yeah. We sort of we think we’re more advanced, but I don’t know actually whether we are. The ocular safety. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. I know. But oh, Jesus. And, you know, it’s interesting. My my father-in-law died at home in February, and it was through the Daw Park palliative care.
But they actually we wouldn’t have been able to keep him there because they he died at sort of ten o’clock in the morning, and by four o’clock, they’d come and collected the bed. Because they needed it for somebody like this. Yeah. So it was like he went and they came in and got all the gear and off they went. So That’s probably the same with all the hospitals and that’s what they do.
Yeah. Just they needed to be there. Yeah. It’s too sad. Yeah.
Mhmm. If he loved with longer, they wouldn’t have kept him out. I know. I mean, that’s a bit Well, true. But it was just the way it was.
They just needed because we had special, like, hospital bed for him, so it was just easy for us to nurse him. So they came and took the bed. Don’t care. It’s the door part, but it and they were lovely. They were not.
He was gone by these. They could come and get the bed. Difficult question, isn’t it? Don’t know until the time about how much you can that person should have. I mean, is the pain I’m only saying because my partner’s mother, they’re Catholic, and she was she died quite horrifically because the morphine was held back.
Isn’t it wouldn’t you know, you sort of have this Conflict. Conflict about letting them die in peace or against how much morphine you do because they do pump it up and assist people to die. So I suppose if they’re in that much pain, they wouldn’t be at peace anyway. So it didn’t really make any difference. A conflict.
So yeah. But they wouldn’t wouldn’t give her any. Their mother had the morphine, any pain relief. And she yeah. And and it’s quite traumatized like she was there when her mother died.
And it was it’s just their their belief. Well Judy, you say or one of you said recommends Well, yeah. So that they’re they’re still able to sort of do, yeah, do their meditations or or or whatever, like, sedate them altogether. But if they’re in a lot of pain, is it okay to zolt them out? You didn’t actually say it, didn’t I?
No. But, yeah, it’s tricky, that one, isn’t it? Is. It is. And I and I think once again, that that goes back to your motivation.
Be our head. I don’t know. We can ask Geshe-la that one too. Would it be if you see them suffering? By giving them this is how I would work it out.
If they’re suffering, by giving them the by giving them the morphine your motivation is to end their suffering. It is. So wouldn’t that be a thing? And to give them a calm. Yeah.
And to give them that’s right. But also, I think that if you don’t let all that negativity, all that negative karma come yeah. Be released, then they could actually be born in a lower realm. I think that’s the other side of it, isn’t it? I think.
Yeah. I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
It’s the same as if you’re working with traumatized people, if you don’t let them shake. It’s the same thing about not allowing the body’s reaction makes it actually harder for that person. Yeah. Yeah. So shaking and rather than administering meditations immediately, allowing a whole trembling shaking reaction to occur is a physical release from the body creates To not only going after this, but it’s a brain thing as well as what we call the mind thing.
So it’s the same thing. Yeah. Mhmm. It’s allowing tonight from a friend of mine, and I was telling her about this. And she said, please remind people that babies die in utero just before they’re born.
Sorry? Please remind people that babies die in utero just before or screaming even in a great deal of pain. Is there this concept within the what Lama Zopa was saying, they shouldn’t be medicated because that intense pain is a way of working off part of the calming death? So if they are unable to then therefore experience that great agonizing suffering, the chances are they’re gonna have a rough rebirth or worse one than if they actually go through this horrible, painful, traumatic thing. I I but I think what he I think what he was saying was that they they can be medicated for pain.
They can have medication for pain, but don’t over them. Heavily sedated. Well, heavily sedated. Exactly. Using the concept of pain and suffering and all that sort of stuff is where you’re coming down.
So therefore, isn’t it not best to some regard as far as the who’s the concept Yeah. Thoughts or whatever. But people don’t have pain just at the time of death. You know what I mean? People, you know, going through, say, cancer that spread to through the bones can be excruciating even more beneficial from a Buddhist rebirth point of view.
Mhmm. Just speaking about something different. Pain as in sedation. Pain versus sedation sort of thing. But not working off karma by going through.
But if you’re in pain, then you wouldn’t be meditating to have a have a better rebirth. So so what’s more important than working off your debt or being more meditated? I think you need to be a Buddha to know exactly what’s more important. That’s what we I think last week I read something from one of the lama, and yeah. I mean, don’t know.
I mean, as normal people, we don’t know what’s actually more the best for the person unless you’re enlightened being and you know exactly that, yeah, if he’s suffering now, he’s going to have a better rebirth instead of, you know, being on medication and not going through this suffering. So it’s really difficult, actually, for normal human beings to know what’s best. Yeah. There was also something I read where it said that you could actually die quite peacefully, but then after you your consciousness had left, something could upset things and you could actually, even though you died peacefully, you could actually go to a lower rebirth. And then like Judy was saying, you you could if if if offerings and things are made on your behalf and prayers and all those sorts of things are said after you’ve died, you your rebirth could actually Elevate.
Yeah. Elevate. Yeah. Mhmm. Yeah.
So a lot you say, we don’t know, do we? So that pain thing would mean that, you know, if we have shouldn’t take Panadol. Mhmm. Oh my goodness. Don’t say that I have a headache every two weeks.
I do. I tell you what, I must have so much an easy life. It’s amazing. A boxthorn. I don’t know what I was.
Oh, it’s big. Yeah. You pick around the Yeah. Back around the head. Yay.
So not medical reason enough to have a seizure. It’s better for the I had that. Yeah. And it’s better that my doctor made me deliver. Yeah.
Mhmm. Because they said it’s it’s better it was better for my body. It’s just better. And then they stick you in with all the newborn babies that have been born. But that’s good too because it gets your brain to connect and understand that there are other babies being born who are alive, so there’s more babies that you could have that are you know, so it helps with the healing.
Yeah, my girlfriend, she lost her baby about two days before she was due to give birth and that was just after my daughter was my daughter was born first. She wanted me to bring Samantha in as a baby. It was really Difficult. Quite emotional. Yeah.
Really difficult, but she wanted that on. Yeah. She wanted bring Same for home births. We Oh, okay. Because we Do you know you normally finish it?
Nine fifteen. Fifteen. Yeah. We were going to do a meditation, but if there’s any other questions, perhaps we should have them, and we’ll we’ll do the meditation. Yeah.
You know what I mean? Like, you could you could look at everything from a current point of view, bit like a bible, you could find any point of view you want in there, you know, depending on how you read it. Mhmm. You know, like, there’s gotta come a point where you’ve just got to accept or just go with your gut. Intuition.
Sure. Is it? Or Surely. So what’s that got to do with pain? Well, no.
I was thinking about painkillers, like with headaches and that. I mean, you can’t relate everything to come on because, otherwise, nobody would ever invented painkillers. Well, if you had an infection and you didn’t wanna take penicillin because So the the med meditation that we thought we would do, because said she hadn’t actually done it with you, is the Purification Meditation. And it’s I think Kathleen McDonald actually is this her version of it? Yes.
Yes. McDonald, which is the the tapes that the CDs that go with these with these books of Lama Zopa’s. Now I’ve never done this one before, and neither has oh you’ve listened to it haven’t you Judy? So I was going to do it but I wasn’t sure if we had to say it loudly. That’s right.
You do. Yeah. You do. If you want to. If you don’t want to, you can say it to Well, I suppose.
That’s right. We would like someone to join in with us, wouldn’t we? Yeah. So that when you visual ise the Om at the crown of your head, and then it will say here to recite Om slowly for several minutes. So we were talking about it before, and we thought perhaps we’d do three and then three and then three.
I a quick question in regards to recitation of mantra? I’ve noticed that pronunciation is different depending on who you speak to. Like, some people say some people say. Does it Oh. The energy raised the vibration of the syllables, how much of an effect, how important is that in recitation of mantra?
Lama Zopa states really clearly in there that the number of recitations you do creates more merit, but only when you bring that good motivation. So the motivation is still crucial, but the number of recitations does matter as well for some practices. The other way I look at it too is that you can become very attached to whether it’s the correct I don’t I don’t know. That’s just my idea. But, yeah, whether because if you go to different centers, they are they are, yeah, we’ll all sit comfortably comfortably and relax the body.
Relax your mind by letting go by letting go of or putting aside any other thoughts of the past or future, people, activities, etcetera. Decide to keep your attention focused on the meditation for the duration of the session. When your mind is calm and settled in the present, generate a positive motivation for doing the meditation. For example, you can think, may this meditation bring about greater peace and happiness for all beings. Or, may this meditation be a cause for me to become enlightened so that I can help all beings become free from suffering and become enlightened as well.
Visualize a white Om in the center of your brain. Recognize that the Om is the pure speech energy of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. Recite Om slowly for several minutes. While reciting it, visualize that white light radiates from the ome in your head and fills your body. All your obscurations and the impure energy of your body are cleansed and purified. You can think of specific negative actions you have done such as killing or harming another being, stealing or unwise sexual behavior, and feel that the imprints of these actions are completely purified.
Your entire body from your feet up to the top of your head is completely filled with radiant blissful white energy. Really feel this. When you stop chanting Om, stay for a while in silence and just be aware. Not thinking anything is good or bad, not reacting, not making mental conversation. Just place all your attention on the light consciousness at the center of your brain.
Be there. Be intensely aware and let go without sluggishness, without distraction. Now visualize a red ah at your throat chakra. It looks similar to the sun when it is setting. Recognize that the Ah is the pure speech energy of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. As you recite ‘Ah’ slowly for several minutes, visualize that red light radiates from the ‘R’ at your throat and your entire body is embraced by this blissful radiating light energy.
It purifies your speech. Purification means that the uncontrolled mind and speech work interdependently with each other. Negativities of speech mean harming and giving pain to others through lying, slander, harsh speech and gossip. You can imagine that the imprints of your negative actions of speech are completely purified by the blissful red light. Having a clean, clear mind and controlled speech is the way is the way to purify impure and uncontrolled speech.
After reciting ‘Ah’ for several minutes, let your mind just be in the state of intense awareness on your own consciousness. Stay there without any expectation or interpretation. Comprehend your experience of the non dual, non self existent ‘I’, nothingness, zero, empty space as truth, reality. This experience is much more real than your waking fantasy sensory world. If an uncontrolled distracted thought comes, remember that not only you, but all other sentient beings are in this situation.
So cultivate much loving kindness for others. Then when loving kindness arises, direct intense awareness of loving kindness towards your own consciousness. So there are two things. Place intense awareness on your own consciousness, and when distractions arise, generate loving kindness for all beings. And then direct intense awareness of loving kindness to your consciousness.
Alternate these two. Next, visualize your loving kindness energy manifesting at your heart chakra in the aspect of a full moon. Visualize at your heart on a moon disc, a blue radiating hum. Recognize that this is the nonduality wisdom of the Buddha’s and Bodhisattva’s energy. Your heart is pure, cool, and calm, opened by the radiating light of the moon and.
Infinite blue light radiates from the and fills your entire body. Your entire body feels blissful. All narrow thoughts disappear. All indecisive minds disappear. All obsessed minds disappear.
Being embraced by the infinite blue light leaves no room for fanatical dualistic concepts. Visualize this while reciting slowly for a few minutes. After this, feel infinite blue light like your consciousness, embracing the entire universal reality. Your intense awareness is embracing the entire universal reality. Feel and be without any expectation or superstition.
We need two experiences, wisdom and method. Wisdom experience is intense awareness of your own conscious reality. This is the way of wisdom. Method is when you again become out of control, distracted. That distracted experience is a big resource to again generate loving kindness.
When there is no distraction, stay in the wisdom. So two things. When there is no problem, place your attention on the wisdom aspect. When you are distracted, switch to method, which is loving kindness. Meditate like this for a couple of minutes.
We will now do the dedication We dedicate the merit or the positive energy of doing this meditation to all living beings. May it be the cause for all beings to be free of their suffering and its causes, uncontrolled disturbing states of mind, and may they all attain perfect peace and happiness. Thank you all very much. And so next week, we are going to see the first part of the Tibetan book of the dead video. For an hour or two?
Or That’s a very good question. Actually, let me check. It should be working somewhere. No? Forty five minutes and thirty five seconds.
Can we do I just have to make jokes of things because otherwise I you know, if I can wanna make This makes me know you’re being healthy. I know. That sounds No. Was good. Thank you so much.
No. That’s alright. But it was good. As I said to Jan, you know, it was very good for me too because even in the pastoral care group, you know, thinking that I hadn’t actually had a client yet from the pastoral care group, but, like, but now I feel more confident I could do it as well. You know?
It is. It’s very good. And I think it looks like you said when I said to you about because I was doing this thing.