Audio recorded at Buddha House Adelaide. Transcript auto-generated and AI-corrected; may contain errors.
About this talk. Batchelor explores the four great vows—foundational aspirations of compassion and wisdom in Buddhist practice—as practical guides for cultivating a heart that remains both open and stable. Opening with the first vow (to save all sentient beings), he challenges literal interpretation and illustrates how genuine compassion requires discernment, not saviour fantasy; it extends to difficult people and includes loving oneself with the same care we offer others. He then turns to the second vow (dissolving compulsions), emphasizing that transformation begins with non-judgmental awareness of habitual patterns rather than forced eradication. The third vow (learning all dharma gates) questions dogmatism within Buddhist schools and encourages drawing wisdom from unexpected sources—psychology, cognitive therapy, lived experience—while remaining historically and culturally literate. The fourth vow affirms the Buddha’s path as attainable and worthwhile. Throughout, Batchelor weaves stories from his decade as a nun in Korea, illustrating how practice unfolds in community, ordinary work, and relationship. He concludes with practical questions from listeners about retreat versus lay practice and how to sustain a daily practice without a sangha.
File metadata (for organising)
File: 08 IT.mp3
UUID: 8b8ad7af-4c2f-4c67-8aca-4ab1541d4f84
Teacher: Batchelor
Collection: Insight Tapes (Batchelor)
Recorded at: Buddha House Adelaide
Words: ~7,101
I like to to look at what is called the four great vows. And this is, in a way, you could say that in term of compassion in the Theravāda tradition, this is expressed through the cultivation of the four Brahma Vihara, especially the loving kindness and the compassion. And and so there, it’s quite obvious, actually, as you do the practice. But actually, in the Zen tradition, if you ask somebody who do Zen, you know, how do you do compassion? They don’t do it actually in the practice.
Because in the practice, they just sit and ask what is this or whatever else they do. And actually, the the compassion is very much, you know, we contain in this environment of the Bodhisattva precepts. But I don’t really have the time to talk about this now. And actually, in a way, one could say the four great vows are in a way contained in the four Bodhisattva precepts. And so in a way to give you a little of the feel, like in the morning of the compassion from the Theravāda Vipassana point of view, and then this evening, I can also introduce it a little from the Zen tradition.
So the four great vows, and this is vows we recite very regularly when we live in a monastery. Sentient beings are numberless, to save them all. Compulsions are inexhaustible. I vow to dissolve them. Dharma gates are limitless.
I vow to learn them all. The Buddha’s way is unsurpassable. I vow to attain it. And so the first one very much, I think, sets the scene for the practice. That the practice also although when we are on retreat in silence, we have this feeling that this is a very introverted activity.
I think it’s very important to see that the meditation is within this context of ethics, meditation, wisdom, and within this, again, wider context of that we don’t just do this for ourselves, ourselves, but in a way, we do this for others as well. So that the practice is to help us, I would say, to connect even more to others, to open our heart, to see them more clearly. And that’s why I think this first vow, sentient beings are numberless. I vow to save them all. It’s kind of in a way saying an intention, that I have this intention intention to see a sentient being.
I have this intention to be there for them. But at the same time, we have to be careful that this is also what I would call a poetic aspiration, inspiration to give us energy, but that we don’t take it literally, that we have to save everyone every single day. You know, so that we’ve spent our day totaling how many we saved today. You know? Oh, I still have quite a few left.
But maybe we can see it more, that actually we are there for beings of all types. Because I think often it is quite easy to be compassionate to what I would call the easy people who are friendly, who are kind, who are nice to us. Then we’re very happy to be compassionate to us. We also, you know, generally like little bunnies as long as, you know, they don’t eat our carrots. Yeah, we can be compassionate.
But in a way, I think the vow is asking us to open ourselves wider than that, and so that we kind of try to see beyond the people we like, we feel comfortable with, and also reach out to in a way, what one could call people who are difficult. And often, I have people who tell me, you know, I find it so difficult, you know, being compassionate to my sister. And I said, but how often do you see your sister? She said, oh, she lives in Germany, and I live in the United States. I said, well, then what is the problem?
She said, well, she phones me. I said, and when she phones me, I’m so I’m so so difficult. I said, but how often does she phone you? Oh, once a week. And I said, but how long?
Half an hour. And I said, well, this is not too difficult, is it? I mean, you’re not living with her all the time. And so in a way, to see that sometime, we stop ourselves from being compassionate. Because of course, it is not easy to be with difficult people.
People are really unhappy. People find things very difficult. But I think, anyway, this is a key of the compassion within the Buddhist tradition, that it is stable and open at the same time. So we are open to the person, but at the same time, when the person person is not with us anymore, when the phone has gone down, anyway, we can let it go. We are very present to it and try to be compassionate then, to be understanding, to be kind.
But once the phone call is finished, it’s gone. One does not have, in a way, to continue it in one’s head. I think often, sometimes, we stop our compassion by, in a way in a way grasping at the condition of the person instead of just being there totally, and then see it’s gone. It’s passed. It arose.
You were present to it, and it’s passed. And now you can open your heart to yourself, to somebody else. And I think to, in a way, consider that, to remember that. And I remember when I was recently in Korea for a conference, I was very touched by a nun when they kind of It was a nun conference, a woman’s conference, and so the Korean nun really had to entertain us in the evening. This is Korean Buddhism.
And so every evening, we would be entertained by all kind of weird and wonderful things. But this time, we were entertained. It was very moving by a choir of nuns who would sing, but as they sang, they would also say the song in sign language. And it was very beautiful to see this very kind of a country folk song in sign language. And at the end of it, the nun who kind of was directing them said to the Buddhist people in the audience, the Korean lay woman, you know, there are deaf people in Korea.
They also need your help. They also need your compassion. You cannot ignore them. They exist. You need to learn to communicate with them.
Because in a way, this is one of the problem with this idea of karma and rebirth in Asian society. That, you know, you are disabled because of past karma. So, you know, too bad. You know, you do what you can this life, and hopefully, next life it will be better. And so it kind of does not encourage you, in a way, to do things with disabled people.
That’s what I would call this very literal kind of fatalistic notion of karma. And I think that’s what the nun was saying. You know, we must see these people as human beings behind all this story about karma, rebirth, but in the present, and learn to communicate with them. And I would say, in a way, this vow to save all sentient beings, we have to be a little careful. Careful.
That because often, I think, in the west, there is this idea that we’re going to save them. Even if they don’t want to be saved, we’re going to save them. And I think we have to be careful with this compassion. You know, I know what is good for you. But I think we have to be careful there.
Maybe I personally see it more as I vow to serve all sentient beings. So more this idea of being available to others, of having space in our heart for others, to in a way go out of our self centeredness through this compassion, as Stephen keeps saying, through this doing, through this acting for the other. And so on that level, this compassion is not a passive compassion, but very much a creative and active compassion. I have a friend. We have a friend in America.
And I’m really, I must say, very always very touched by this man. And recently, he sent us an email. And he said, my business was very good this year, because he’s into some kind of finance, some mortgaging financing. It’s kind of a little kind of weird, but it works. And he said, you know, I had a very good year.
Can I give another ten thousand dollars to your favorite charity? And we said, sure. Why not? You know? If you got them, you know, we have this charity we cannot support in South Africa for AIDS in a very poor village.
And we said, you know, just send it again there. Because last year he did the same. He said, you know, do you have a charity you want to instead of giving Dana to us, he kind of Dana was to give it to a charity. And we said, yeah, sure. Give it to them.
They really need it. But what is interesting about him is that he lives he’s a very wealthy man. But he lives in a very in terms of being wealthy, very ordinary house. And when people who work under him, in his company, come to his house, they can’t understand it. They can’t understand why he live in such an ordinary house.
Just two room, For America, just two bathroom. No garden, really. I mean, it’s really kind of poor. I mean and but he says, I don’t need anymore. Why would I need a big house?
What for? Don’t I mean, I have a wife. My children are left home. I don’t need more space than that. And he’s very contented with just this ordinary house.
And in a way, his aim nowadays is because I mean, he had he has had a very kind of painful life in many different ways, and then he found Buddhism, and then he found meditation. And he said, you know, my aim in life now is, of course, to earn money, but to make surplus. To make lots of surplus so that I can give it to other people. And I don’t need much money for myself. And to me, this is very, what I would call, creative wise compassion.
Because he has certain skill, he can make money obviously, but he doesn’t see that much that he needs that much of it. He doesn’t need to impress anybody, and he just can then share it all over the world with all kind of project, all kind of charity. So in a way, to see how each of us because not all of us is a kind of, you know, able to make money in that way. I am not. That’s for sure.
But each of us can find our creative wise way to be compassionate. I think this is very important. Each of us has to find it for ourselves. And it can just be, in a way, for someone to play domino with one’s grandmother. It can be to help a neighbor.
It can be to write a letter for amnesty internationally. It can be so many different things. I think in a way, to me, compassion is this array of possibility that we can be creative within our life, within whom we encounter, also what we interested and what is our ability. But in a way, in these sentient beings to be saved, there is also, I think, is very important is our self. That we are included in this sentient being.
Because often, I think, we see compassion as being for others. But I think compassion is also for ourselves. I think this is very important that we are one of the sentient being included in this vow. And at that level, I think it’s very interesting to reflect on what I would call the cross relationship with compassion and also with love. And to see how the Buddha often and we’ve talked a lot about grasping, about self centeredness, about this kind of self focus on ourselves.
And what is interesting about this self focus is that for some strange reason, a lot of the time we don’t love ourselves. Often we criticize ourselves, we think we’re not good enough, or we always make the same mistake, or we did not achieve this, or we did not do this. I mean, we have a lot of what I would call negative loop tape within ourselves. And then what is difficult is that we have all these negative loop tape, and at the same time, we totally focus on ourselves. So in a way, we’re focusing on this person we don’t like, and we stop with.
And I think, in a way, maybe part of the compassionate attitude would be actually to love ourselves. You know, because I mean, also it because it would be an easy way to feel well. Because how do you feel when you love something? When you love something, you feel warm. You feel kind of light.
You feel like there is life. And so in a way, why can’t we give this to ourselves? Because I mean, this is the easiest person to give it to. I mean, it’s right next to you. And so in a way, to see that, that also I would say is compassion.
To love ourselves, I would say, is a compassionate act. Also, not just for yourself, because if you start to love yourself and be kinder to yourself, generally, you will also be kinder to others, and generally easier to live with. So in a way, it’s not just for yourself this. It also considers other. So in that way, opening to ourselves, opening to others.
And within that, I think it’s very important to see that there is a spectrum within compassion. At some time, we have to have more compassion for ourselves, sometimes more for others, and sometimes we go in between. It’s very important there is not one type of compassion. There are many different kinds because, in a way, there are many different beings and also many different situations. And also, as at level, to be often there is this feeling with compassion, that this feeling that there is too much suffering in the world.
And so we feel if we feel that we open our heart in compassion, we’re going to be overwhelmed. And I think that’s why the meditation is so important with a compassionate attitude. Because when we cultivate meditation, we cultivate stability. And through that stability, we can be with suffering in a different way so that we’re not overwhelmed by suffering. We know it, we feel it, we’re saddened by it, but we’re actually not taken down by it.
We can, in a way, be with it in this way which doesn’t grasp and does not reject. But we can, in a way, embrace suffering in a different way. And through that, we can more creatively respond to it. And so I would say, in a way, within that creative way is compassion. Something we can easily do is listening.
How do we listen? To really listen, because compassion for me is not to, I know what’s what, I know what you need. But it’s very much listening to what is it the person needs, what is it they want, and also, can I give it? And sometimes you might not be able to give it. The only thing you can do is be there for that.
I remember when I was in Korea, I would repeatedly get letters because I would appear in the newspaper as this special French nun. And I would get these letters from youngsters, a young Korean boy or girl, maybe eighteen, seventeen, nineteen. And they would tell me, I am so poor. Can you help me? Can you give me some money?
I mean, they must have thought because I was Western. I must have lost some money. And, you know, and, generally, I just had, you know, like five pounds to my name as a nun. And so I would send them the five, pounds, but I would say, that’s all I have. I’m sorry.
I can’t do anything else. So in a way, to see that sometimes we ask, but we cannot give, but at least we can be there for the person. I think this is important. The fact that we cannot give what is required doesn’t mean we cannot be there, in a way human to human, with that person. And then there is a second vows.
Compulsions are inexhaustible. I vow to dissolve them all. And I feel in a way, it’s kind of this vow is saying, yes, I want to work with my negative pattern, destructive habits. And I remember once when I was in Korea, I met this great master, a Zen master who was very helpful with the nuns, and think very nice. And I went to visit him with another nun, and he looked at me very serious, because he was very impulsive.
I mean, twice my size, very imposing. And he looked at me, he said, you’re dark. Aren’t you dark? Thought, but I’m not really that dark. You know, it was kind of funny.
What do mean on the spot? And then I reflected that, yes, you know, there is a place within ourselves. And if we don’t address them, if we don’t look at them, then we will be blinded to them. And so they will make us us act in a certain way, which actually will be destructive for ourselves, for others. And I think this is in a way part of the meditation process, is to become aware of our compulsion, of our patterns, of our habit, not as a program of eradication, but in a way as a program of getting to grip with them, encountering them, knowing them, noticing them.
And I remember when I was in Korea one time, early on in my nun career, very early days, and sometimes we had westerner passing by, and we had to explain to them Buddhism. I was just a nun for maybe a few months, but I still had to explain Buddhism. And I had always trouble at the beginning with the lists. I even had trouble with the four noble truths. I always forgot one.
And so here I am, trying to say, yes, yes. First noble truth, yes, suffering. Second noble truth, yes, craving. And suddenly, I saw a monk. He was pinching my persimmon.
I picked them up myself. They were in my pocket. So I go, I said, you can’t take my persimmon. This is my persimmon, you know. And so he went off, and I came back and he said, yes, I remember.
Third one, the cessation of craving and the eightfold path. And they left happily. And then there was another nun there, and she turns to me, and she said, didn’t you notice? I said, noticed? She’s what?
But you know when you were explaining the noble truth, suddenly you were very angry. And it’s only then I realized what I had done. I had done it on automatic pilot. You know, they were my persimmon. Nobody could take that, you know, grasping, craving.
And it was very interesting. It was a very interesting moment for me to kind of become aware how sometimes you go on automatic, you don’t see. So in a way, in order to do anything about compulsions, you have to see them first. You have to acknowledge them. You have to accept them.
And then, in a way, we can work on transforming them. But I think this is a very important part of this compulsion. Before, in a way, thinking of dissolving them, I think it’s knowing them, understanding them, and then working on in a way de intensifying them, in a way de disempowering them. Then there is a third one, which is, Dharma gates are limitless. I vow to learn them all.
And personally, would say that this one, most school of Buddhism, they actually don’t do. Because they basically, it says, Dharma gates are limitless. I vow to learn them all. But generally, whatever school, whatever tradition in Buddhism you enter, they generally will tell you, this is the only way. This is what you have to do.
This is the best way. Everything else, not very good. So actually, generally, you’re encouraged to just learn a few Dharma gates. And I think because in a way what happens is that, in a way somebody does something, some practice, and I think that’s the way that’s been going on in the tradition, you do something, it’s good for you. So because you think it’s good for you, it’s the right thing to do.
Then because it’s the right thing to do, it very easily becomes the only thing to do, and easily everybody must do this. So in a way I think this vow really makes us question, in a way I would say, dogmatism, to really think we know what is the best. I think we can know what is the best for us, but I don’t think we can know what is the best for everyone. Because I know in my experience, you know, when I was in Korea, they did not think much of Japanese Zen. In Japan, they thought Korean Zen was terrible.
And the reason for that was because they sat in meditation on a warm floor. How could anybody awaken on a warm floor? I ask you. Then you have the Korean. I did not think much of the Tibetan.
You know, Tibetan, you know, all these mantras, magic, and mystery. No. No. No. No.
They did not think much of that. But then we went. This was one of my best moment. We were in Tibet in nineteen eighty five, and we just stopped being monks and nuns. And so the we were in Lhasa, and we went to eat.
Some of them very little to eat, but there were some kind of noodles and a few piece of vegetables. And then notice, we looked a little Buddhist. We kind of had some kind of aura of Buddhism. And so I said, oh, are you Buddhist? I said, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, we’re Buddhist. And they say, but you know, where did you learn it? And so we said, you know, oh, Zen, you know, like Chinese Buddhism. And then they said, ah, Chinese Buddhism? We vanquished it.
And I thought, I turned to Stephen, they vanquished it. And I look at them and they say, yeah, yeah, you know, in the Samye debate. So I turn to Stephen, Samye debate? And Stephen say, oh yes, in the twelfth century, yeah. But the way he said it was like yesterday.
It happened yesterday, so it was quite an interesting moment. Because it’s a debate between a Tibetan and a Chinese. And of course, the Tibetan wins. And of course, in the Chinese scripture, they say he wins, but whatever. So in a way, to see that in a way we presented with practices, and these practices have a cultural context, have an experiential context.
And I think sometimes it’s important to see what is it that is really from the culture, the Korean culture, the Japanese culture, and what is it really the practice that is in a way a true Dharma gate for ourselves? Because I can still remember to this day when I was in Korea, I had to always wear socks. A good Buddhist, a good meditator always wore socks. Even in the summer, even if it was forty five degree. Okay.
I go to Japan in November, rather cold. And then I must not wear socks. Because if I wear socks, I really can’t enlighten. You know, you have to have barefoot, you know? True awakening requires barefoot.
Then I go to Taiwan, And then I see sometimes they have socks, and sometimes they don’t. And I think maybe they’ve reached the truth of socklessness. And so I go to the meditation hall at one point without socks. And then when I come out, somebody’s waiting for me. This was terrible.
So insulting. So desperate. No socks. But I said, come on. Sometime you don’t have it.
I have only after four o’clock in the afternoon. That’s all. But in a way, to be careful. You know that often we do this. We think this is so important.
But I think what is really important is in a way the compassion, the wisdom, not so much the cultural kind of phenomenon. And also to see that all these practice that we find now, this Dharma Gate, are geographically and historically contingent. This, I think, is very important. But at the same time, also not to be caught in this. Because I remember we were in Korea, and a book came out about koans.
You know, that actually some of the koans were not true stories. So, you know, we all rushed to master koans, and because koans are very important to them. And we said, master, master, but you see in this book, they say that, you know, the the koans are not historically true. And he looked at us and said, so what? They still works.
And so in a way, of course, we can have that historical perspective, and at the same time, we have to see what is it that works, what is it that inspires us. I think this is also another thing that we have to look because we can I know Stephen has a certain idea that inspires him, obviously? But it’s not necessarily what’s going to inspire you. I think this is very important. And I think that’s what the master was saying.
Okay, the koans might not have happened. But as stories, they still were. They still point something out that you can relate to, even so many century later. So in a way, to see that the Buddha developed many different practices, then from that, many different people, you know, developed even more creatively. And now we found them.
But at the same time, we cannot learn them all. In a way, we can explore, we can try, we can deepen, but we can only do a few at a time, or one at a time. So in a way to see, as I said before, that we can be grounded in one thing, but also explore other things. To kind of, in a way, again, take care of this multidimensionality. And also to be careful, it’s not only Buddhist Dharma gates.
I think it’s nice that he did not say all Buddhist gate, but Dharma gates. And actually, we can find the Dharma in many different ways. Personally, at the moment, I’m reading a lot about cognitive therapy. I think, in a way, a lot of what the Buddha was teaching is very similar. And I’m very interested in reading books about it.
It gives me lots of idea. And so in a way, we have to be careful not to limit ourselves to Buddhism. I think we can find the Dharma. The Dharma gates in many different ways. And also to see what is it that makes us grow?
What is it that makes us reflect? What is it that helps us to be stable? To be open? To be more creative? I remember for myself, I was a nun for ten years, and I had nothing to do with children for ten years.
And I was a nun from twenty two to thirty two. And then I came back to the West and lived in England near here, And there was all these little beings, and I had no idea what to do with them. You know, I would see them, and I was not sure. It was kind of like I was encountering a different species. And I felt quite separate.
And I thought, but that’s, in a way, not a good way to be. You can’t relate to them. So then I went on to a preschool learning course for six months. And it was the best thing I ever did. You know, to learn about how to be with children and some of the psychology and doing little painting and little cut outs.
I mean, all kind of, you know and going to the kindergarten and things like this. And now I have a great time with children. And kind of recently, I got this great it was great kind of praise. Friends came with children, and, you know, straight away I did things with them. I always have games for them and various thing.
And then the children ask their parents, but is she a teacher? Is she a kindergarten teacher? So obviously the training had some impact. So in a way to see, there are many different way to develop ourselves, many different Dharma gates. So in a way, to see our journey as a journey of discovery.
And then the last one, the Buddha’s way is unsurpassable. I vow to attain it. This doesn’t mean that the Buddha’s way is the highest or the only way, but that it is valuable for us, that it is very rich for us. And also that I think is saying, I can do this. I can walk upon this path.
I can progress upon this path. It is not unattainable. So I think it’s very important to see that, that in a way we what we do in the practice, also cultivating ethic, cultivating wisdom, that in a way this make us grow, so that we can help ourselves. We can also help others. And sometimes we don’t have to do anything.
We just have to be, to be those qualities that we develop in the practice. And I remember I used to visit a friend at Taizé, so I said, can I help you? And she said, can you visit my mother who is in a nursing home? And quite unhappy there. And so every week, I went to see this old lady.
And later on, the daughter told me that one of the things she liked the most about my visit is that I was so calm. I could just be so still with her because she she was a quaker, the mother. And all around her, it was very busy, lots of activity, lots of she felt like a little tense from all this kind of demand, even in these old people’s home. And so when I we spent an hour once a week, and she just liked being with somebody who could be calm. And sometimes we had this moment of just being in silence together.
And she really benefited from that. So we need to see that we might have already developed more than we think we have. I think we have to be careful, again, of that tendency to belittle what we have achieved, what we understand, what we have realized. And in a way, maybe, when we leave this retreat tomorrow, to remember this nun I met in Korea. And I asked her, what is your practice?
And she told me, her practice was to be a Buddha. So every morning, she did a little meditation, and then her intention was to manifest the wisdom and the compassion of the Buddha in the day. And then at the end of the day, she would review the day, think, how Buddha like was I? How sentient being like being like was I? And then the next day, again, trying to be a Buddha.
And maybe each of us, can we be Buddha for ourselves? Can we be Buddhas for others? And so in a way to see these vows as power of intention, in a way giving ourselves a direction, but also power of recognition that, yes, I can do this, and also power of meaning. That actually, these are the value, the ground upon which our life can be lived and cultivated. So that’s what I wanted to say today.
And just I had a note, a question about practice, in terms of if someone really wants to practice. The question basically was saying, you know, should I go to a monastery? Should I go on a long retreat? Or should I, you know, stay in daily life? You know, how do I make this kind of decision of how to continue in the practice?
And often people ask me that, you know, how do I decide? Is it to do a long retreat or how do I decide to become a monk or to become a nun? And my answer is, if it is the only thing you want to do at that moment. And if in a way there are no obstacle to you doing it. I remember when I became a nun.
I had no partner, no children, I was not doing any training. I had really nothing that stopped me from doing that. And I thought, then why not do this? This, you know, I can do this now. I have the time, and this is truly something I want to try.
I want to do myself. So to me, this would be the first thing that you really want to do it. If you have any doubt, then I would say don’t do it. Because actually, going on retreat is easier. To want to go on retreat, this is relatively easy.
Then the only thing you have to find is first if you can do it in terms of time or responsibility, and if you have the money to do it, of course. Or if you can find a place where you don’t need money, that also is possible. I mean, I had a friend, she found a very cheap place to do this kind of like hermitage retreat. And she even brought seeds and planted seeds, so she did not have to spend too much money on food. So that was really kind of do I why kind of retreat.
So in a way, we can find that. But I think if one thing consider becoming a monk and a nun, I think you have to be very careful. Because becoming a monk and a nun is not just about practice. Becoming a monk and a nun is entering a culture, is entering a center, entering community life. And I would say one of the greatest training aspect of being a monk and nun is community life, is being in a different culture more than practice, actually.
Because you cannot be self centered when you are a monk and a nun. And that’s why once the kind of the honeymoon period pass, it is not easy to be a monk and a nun. Because you live with all these people, and although they are shaved head and wear a certain robe, they’re not different from human beings. They have the same greed, hatred, and delusion. And so in a way, you find yourself in the same place.
But of course, with different people, we have a very definite environment, which of course, if you have enough intention, you can go beyond this greed, hatred, and delusion. And I would say my time in Korea was one of the best time of my life, an invaluable training. But I think one has to see it is, again, multidimensional. It is not just an abstract idea. And also, I think we can develop our practice in daily life.
I really believe this. Like my friend Grant, the one who raised all this money, that fellow is amazing. He’s in this huge company. You mean, it’s kind of you go there and all these people are in front of this weird screen with all the indexes of the markets. Mean, it’s kind of you know, it’s very I mean, it’s a big company, very wealthy person.
But, you know, at least one month a year, he goes on retreat. Retreat. And that’s what he does. That’s what he wants to do in his life. And some of the other time, you know, he does other things for charitable for charity and things like that.
But also, we can actually do it in an ordinary life. I I have a friend nowadays. Because of the situation with her mother and her brother, who are both disabled, she actually can’t come to even day long meditation or to group meditation because she had to take care of them every weekend. But this, you know, we write to each other, but this become her practice. And she actually has learned a lot through actually dedicating herself to her mother and her brother with amazing compassion.
And I think she actually might be developing more than someone who might go on a very long retreat. So to see that actually we can practice in so many different way. Each of us, we have to find this in our life, in our own way. Are there any questions? Yeah.
You’ve taught us four or five different practices and there are a few others that you haven’t tried, like meditation on death and things like that. Assuming most of us have a daily practice and we meditate daily, how would you suggest that we combine those, say if three of them really work for us? Should we do them sequentially or I would just actually say keep to one. Keep to one you feel quite comfortable. If you’re more comfortable with the breath, just do the breath most of the time.
And then bring the other tool of awareness in your daily life. That’s the way I would suggest it. But again, to see. You see, to see, to find. Sometimes people might find the breath and the question good, or some people might find loving kindness good.
You see, this I think you have to I would not say you need to do many of them. You mean in in your daily life, mean? Listening in your daily life, being aware of the body as you work. You see, meditation is not just on the cushion. For it to really become meditation in daily life, it is bringing the awareness to, in a way, everything we do.
So I feel that it’s good to just keep, you know, keep one what works, breath or sound or sensation or whatever it is, but that the meditation helps you to be calm, but also to inquire. And then in the day, to try to use the other method. Because you see, you can’t watch the breath all the time in the in the day, for example. You can’t do loving kindness all the time. It’s not very practical, you know?
So there are some, like I would say, if you do something more mechanical, in a way more body oriented, if you do gardening, then you can be very aware of your body. If you are a therapist, then what I think you’re working on is listening. Listening in a different way. If you work at a computer like myself, then I think it’s very important to be aware of the body and also aware of your thought. You know, to kind of, can I not go ahead of myself?
Can I not be distracted but really present present here? So to me, that’s why I presented all the tools of awareness for you to find one which was a good one for you, and also to see that also this other one you can do more as a kind of a daily practice. Okay. Then maybe I’ll just say, you know, can ask questions or encourage each other to keep going in a culture, as Steven said, which is is not encouraging. Well, you see, sometimes you have groups.
Like you have like in America, I’m aware of one group, and they would you know, they were meeting once a week, and every week, they would have a theme. And and so and then kind of they would have a theme they would work on, compassion or I mean, even though sometimes it was, you know, just being aware of sound or whatever it was. And then, you know, they would a week later, they would all kind of tell each other how it was, you know, to work with that particular subject. I think this is one way. If, again, if one doesn’t have a sangha around, again, once we had this group over two years where a group of people would come together and practice.
But what it was interesting in terms of what you say is that we would give it again, give them subject to look at in their life. And then actually, some of them would email each other about it. Because you see, sometimes you can be physically close to each other, see each other once a week, and then you can work on these things, or also by email. And nowadays, I mean, nowadays, you have kind of so many Buddhist blogs. I discovered Buddhist blogs.
And you actually, I mean, you know, there is the good, the bad, and the ugly, I must say. But some of them are really, you see people who try really in their daily life, and that also can inspire you. So I think, yes, I would agree. In a way to look at what is it that helps me. Is it contact with other?
Is it email contact? Is it listening to tape? Is it reading books? Is it I think everybody’s situation is a little different. And so one has to kind of see.
I mean, of course, I mean, myself and Stephen, although we are the only Buddhist in a kind of maybe thirty kilometer vicinity. I mean, at least there is the two of us.